Category Archives: Defending Traditional Marriage

Reality Relationships?

Random Questions

For the record, I have never watched a single episode of The Bachelor. I couldn’t care less. But when went to pay for my groceries, I walked by the magazines and saw this. Unbelievable, in a sad, pathetic way.

bachelor virginI don’t want to say too much. All I want to do is ask some questions. You don’t even have to answer them; I just have to get them off my chest.

  1. What kind of blooming idiots think, after the first season of this nonsense, that true love is being picked from a list of narrowed-down options?
  2. Who seriously believes anyone in Hollywood is still a virgin?
  3. So, Mr. Lowe, how do you feel about a dozen non-virtuous, camera-hungry females fighting for your affection?
  4. What kind of real woman would sit by and wait for a guy to decide between some other woman and her? Most real women would say, “H@#*, no!”
  5. What does it say about people when they are “stunned” to hear someone is saving himself for marriage? Were they expecting to be treated with respect by a guy would sleep with every girl in the line-up?
  6. What does it say about your dating habits when you go to a “Fantasy Suite” for a date, but find it awkward – because there won’t be any sex?
  7. How shallow and pitifully void of morality is the idea of “coping” with a “sexless engagement?”
  8. Who actually thinks this is a good way to find wife?
  9. What kind of mother says to her daughter, “I’m so proud of how you fought off all those other girls and won a man that had a hard time deciding between you and that other contestant!”?
  10. Are you kidding me? THIS is reality?

Random Verses

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.” – Hebrews 13:4 ESV

“But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.” – 1 Corinthians 7:2 ESV

“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” – Proverbs 31:10 KJV

A Final Thought

I wonder how a real dad with a real shotgun would influence Mr. Bachelor’s decision making process? I don’t guess that matter much, though, since it seems Sean Lowe picked his bride to be.

Hope it works out, bubba. Reality is tough on a marriage made in fantasy land.

 

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Filed under Culture Wars, current events, Defending Traditional Marriage, Divorce, Relationships and Family

Father of the Year?

The News

Bill ClintonIf you have not seen the news, on January 9th former president Bill Clinton was named “father of the year” by The National Father’s Day Committee. My first response was, “You’ve got to be kidding me!” Well, at least that is what I think I said. It’s all a blur too me, now. Sadly, I may have even used the Lord’s name in vain.

Yes, the former president of the United States of America, the man who made the term “Lewinsky” famous, was named “father of the year” in expectation of the upcoming Father of the Year Awards banquet to be held June 11, 2013.

Me haveth some questions…

Question One

Who in the world is The National Father’s Day Committee?

Have you ever seen those cheap, plastic trophies that say, “World’s Greatest Dad“? They are handed out by loving children all over the civilized world (at least the parts that have Wal-Marts and Dollar Stores). I never knew there was an actual “Council” who determined who was the actual father of the year.

But believe it or not, The National Father’s Day Council was created in 1931 “to achieve universal observance of then little known holiday – Father’s Day.” Then, starting in 1942, the National Father’s Day Committee began conferring honors upon “contemporary life style leaders of our society,”the first being Douglas MacArthur.

Other top dads of the year have been Pat Boone (1960), Tom Brokaw (1978), Mario Andretti (1997), and Randy Jackson (2008).

Question Two

What in the name of all that’s holy caused these people to pick Bill Clinton?

This is the real question. What caused a group of presumably intelligent people to come to the conclusion that the best example of fatherhood this country had to offer was a compulsive womanizer? May I suggest two words? Blue dress! Two more words: Jennifer Flowers!

After doing a little reading, I finally found out what led the National Father’s Day Committee to select Bill Clinton as “father of the year.” Tell me if you think they are worthy of a plastic trophy.

Really? Are they serious? These are reasons to call someone the national “father of the year”? Whatever happened to stuff like faithfulness? Even the Huffington Post (liberal as the day is long) thought this was a joke!

A Better Choice

I don’t know about you, but I think they could have made a far better choice for “father of the year” than ol’ “Slick Willy.” As a matter of fact, any man who can check off the majority of the following list deserves a bigger plastic trophy than Clinton ever will.

  • father-of-the-year-trophyNever cheats on his wife, even in Vegas.
  • Plays with his children, even when he is tired.
  • Holds down a real job, even two, in order to keep a roof over his family’s head.
  • Gives to others without having a reporter take pictures.
  • Hugs his wife in public – because he actually wants to.
  • Treats all women with respect and would rather die than abuse one.
  • Knows his family is more important than his career.

Forget the U.N., foreign countries, foundations, and presidential libraries. A real father is defined by commitment, consistency, faithfulness, compassion, strength, leadership, and sacrifice.

“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.” – Ephesians 5:25

“Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.” – Colossians 3:19

“Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” – 1 Peter 3:7 NIV

And then there’s this guy. He had his daughter pose half-naked to sell a car on Ebay. At least Bill taught Chelsea to keep her clothes on in public. Good grief!

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13 Things (I Don’t Want to Do)

Year-End Sermon

On Sunday night, December 30, 2012, I preached the final sermon of the year at Riverside Baptist Church. It was an honor to stand before the congregation and deliver a word from the Lord. So, what was the message I chose to encourage and motivate us all as we faced the new year?

Forgetting the past and reaching toward the things before has been preached countless times. Beginning again has been covered, as well as how to have a prosperous new year. Therefore, this year I decided to do something a little different. Instead of talking about resolutions or remembering, I simply listed 13 things I do not want to do in 2013.

I Don’t Want to…

1. Believe another politician. Why did I ever? I won’t do it this year, that’s for sure. Even if he/she is telling the truth, how would I know? Let God be true, and every man a liar, especially those running for office (Romans 3:4).

2. Eat more in one sitting than the average family in Africa eats in a week. (Prov. 23:21; 21:17)

3. Lie, cheat, or steal, even when it’s socially acceptable. This is especially important during tax season, but there are many times we lie to each other, deprive each other, and take what isn’t ours. Have you ever told someone you were “fine” when you actually weren’t? You lied. Used two coupons instead of one, just because the cashier didn’t notice? You stole.

4. Be angry.  Anger rarely solves anything. Angry people are miserable and always finding fault. Angry people turn a leisurely drive into a demolition derby. “Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools” (Ecclesiastes 7:9).

5. Whine or complain. What do I have to complain about? Really?

6. Tell people how stupid they are. I don’t understand why some people act the way they do, but I need to be a little more understanding of idiots, morons, ignoramuses, and bone-headed nincompoops. They must answer to God, not me, for their actions (Rom 14).

7. Add another x to my large. I can’t afford any more clothing. Even now I must wear Hawaiian shirts year-round because nothing will stay tucked in. I mean, seriously! The last thing I need is to expand the “temple.” (1 Corinthians 6:19)

8. Lose another favorite sock. I can’t figure out how it happens, but something has to be done.

9. Waste time.  Today I listened to my two girls play with a new ukulele. They laughed and sang.  Soon they will be grown, and there will be no more music, games, or bedtime stories. “Man is like to vanity: his days are as a shadow that passeth away” (Psalm 144:4).

10. Get a divorce.  Many do it because the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence. They don’t realize the unnatural stuff has a nasty aftertaste. I want to stay with the woman God gave me. Who could be better than a gift from God?  “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth” (Proverbs 5:18).

11. Give one more dollar to a guy on the street….without offering the gospel as a condition. If he wants a dollar, then fine. I’ll give him $5 if he lets me tell him about Jesus.

12. Be on a reality TV show. So many people say, “Anthony, your family would make a great reality show.” I say, “Yes, I know.” However, it ain’t gonna happen. The world isn’t ready for it.

13. Forget to pray. I don’t pray enough. More is better. What I need is to follow David’s example and pray morning, noon, and evening (Psalm 55:17). I shudder to think how much I’ve given up by forgetting to spend time with God.

James 4:17  “Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.”

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Filed under Christian Living, Defending Traditional Marriage, Divorce, Do not judge, Future, God, Life Lessons, Preaching, Relationships and Family, scary new year, the future, Uncategorized

Family Resemblance

Wedding Update

Not long ago I wrote about how I hated weddings. Well, I might need to update that a little. If all weddings could be like the one I just officiated, I might be a little more excited.

Yesterday (11-10-12) I had the honor to unite Alicia, my step-daughter, and Josh Westbrook in marriage. It was a fun, sweet, and beautiful ceremony which brought both laughter and tears. At one point, unlike most any other time, I was almost sad it was over (and then I remembered how much cleanup had to be done).

One moment that I will always remember was my opening statement…”Wuv, Twue Wuv…” Yes, I actually said it.

Proud Father

Even though a professional photographer was taking pictures, I got Katie to take a picture of just Alicia and me. I wanted to be able to remember standing next to such a beautiful bride.

Of course, all dads think their daughters are beautiful, right? This is no exception. However, I can truly say she got her looks from her mother, not me. If you see any resemblance between us, then it is only coincidental, because remember, she’s my step-daughter.

But even though Alicia may not have gotten any of her physical characteristics from me, there were some other characteristics she did inherit, and they were made known through her vows to Josh.

The Vows

Instead of doing it the old-fashioned, traditional way, Alicia and Josh wrote their own vows (which made it easier on me). Josh actually said his by memory (or made them up as he went along, I don’t know), but Alicia had to read hers. She gave them to me to hold until her turn.

After Josh recited his vows, Alicia looked at me, which was my cue to give her the vows she had printed on piece of paper. Then, as she read those words, halted slightly by her tears, her relation to me became evident. The family resemblance was obvious. See if you can pick up on it.

I, Alicia, take you Josh, my best friend, to be my husband.

I give you this ring, my heart, and every part of me.

With it I vow to always: love, honor, respect, and cherish you forever.

I promise to always be open and honest, be there in good times and bad, and to be forever faithful.

I promise to always live first for our God and then for you as your helpmate as it is commanded in His Word.

I promise to always be your partner, your best friend, and your number one fan.

I promise to always listen to the words you speak, and listen even harder for the ones that you don’t.

I promise to embrace whatever changes life throws at us as it will only make us grow closer together.

I promise to always laugh with you, give you back scratches every night and to always give you those “madly in love kisses” no matter how old we are.

I promise all of this to you in front of God and these witnesses until death do us part because we WILL NOT FAIL!

The Promise

A lot of promises are made at weddings. Many times those promises are broken, leaving hearts and lives in ruin. But marriages in which the couple puts God first, then loves each other with the sacrificial love He modeled in Christ, are far more likely to see those promises kept.

And when it comes to promises, I am thankful for this one: “Train up a child in the way [she] should go: and when [she] is old, [she] will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6).

I am very proud of you, Alicia.

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Filed under Christian Maturity, Defending Traditional Marriage, Life Lessons, Relationships and Family

I “_____” Weddings

“_____”?

I know what you must be thinking (I am a mind reader, you know; you have to be to survive around women), “what does ‘_____’ stand for?”

Do I really have to say? I mean, come on, I am a preacher, a pastor, a man of the cloth…I am supposed to be all about weddings, right? Right? If nothing else, it’s a good way to make a quick buck, right? Right?

Oh, you have no idea…no idea…

A Symbol

Don’t misunderstand, I love what weddings are all about. I believe in weddings. As a matter of fact, God loves weddings so much He uses them to describe the ultimate coming together of the Body of believers (the Bride) and His Son, Jesus Christ (John 3:29).

God loves and promotes marriage, even to the point where He says that He “hates divorce.”

“For the LORD God of Israel says That He hates divorce, For it covers one’s garment with violence,” Says the LORD of hosts. “Therefore take heed to your spirit, That you do not deal treacherously.” – Malachi 2:16 NKJV

God hates divorce because, just as marriage symbolizes His love for us, divorce symbolizes unfaithfulness. He said, “I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee” (Hebrews 13:5). So, don’t get me wrong – I totally LOVE marriage.

A Serious Pain

What I DON’T LOVE are all the practical realities of wedding ceremonies. The logistics. The non-logistics. You name it.

Have you ever noticed mothers and fathers crying when their children get married? It is not because they are losing/gaining children; it’s because they are relieved the nightmare is over! (My wife just said, “OH, Anthony!“)

Here, let me just provide you with a simple, ten-point list of things that irritate me, then you might better understand why I “_____” weddings.

  1. 4,937 peasants could be fed for two months and 4 days for what one wedding cake can cost.
  2. No matter how much pre-marital counseling I do, I know everything I say is going in one ear and out the other.
  3. There are always people who “have reason why these two should not be married,” but they are too cowardly to stand up and say something.
  4. Family members are just as likely to kill each other over the color of mints as the number of ruffles on a wedding gown.
  5. Wedding cake tastes like lard.
  6. Everybody always gets new clothes – except the preacher.
  7. Brides-to-be and their mothers are pickier than Eric Clapton on speed (Old Age Alert: Eric Clapton is an actual musician who plays a real guitar, not one attached to a game console).
  8. Shotguns are not allowed anymore.
  9. Daughters force their parents to watch episode after episode of Say Yes to the Dress, Four Weddings, and My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding. (Did I mention I have a daughter getting married?)
  10. If I mess up the vows, then I am responsible for ruining the lives of females who never forgive.

I “Like” Weddings

Is “like” the best word? It’s not what best describes my feelings, but I guess it will have to do. But may I suggest a few things that would help me “love” weddings more?

  1. Elvis actually showing up to say, “I did not look like that, thangya very much.”
  2. Grilled steak instead of cake (Dr. Atkins would be proud).
  3. No dancing. Period. None. People that don’t know how to dance should just sit in a chair and eat steak.
  4. Bags of money, instead of rice or bubble makers (Cleaning up would be much easier).
  5. A simple promise that the bride and groom will take their vows as seriously as their choice of cake toppers.

Seriously

Seriously, if you are getting married, God bless you! May your union be filled not only with love, but also the commitment it takes to show that love to each other throughout the years to come.

And if at all possible, I prefer my steak a nice, pink medium. I do.

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Filed under Defending Traditional Marriage, Food, Humor, ministry, Relationships and Family

Would You Sign?

The following post is not meant to offend or make anyone uncomfortable, especially my friends who hold to different beliefs. However, please understand that there are times when we must speak out for the things we value.
Check back later for more crazy posts about crazy stuff.

The Declaration

As we enter into the last few days before a presidential election, we need to be in prayer for our country. The future direction of our country could literally be at stake, and that is a view held by people on both sides of the political isle.

But as a believer in Christ, I feel it is my duty to encourage those in leadership to guide this great nation down a path that secures basic liberties and promotes certain values I hold dear. That is why I signed the Manhattan Declaration.

What is the Manhattan Declaration? It is a “call of Christian conscience.” The following is a quote from ManhattanDeclaration.org

Christians, when they have lived up to the highest ideals of their faith, have defended the weak and vulnerable and worked tirelessly to protect and strengthen vital institutions of civil society, beginning with the family. It was in this tradition that a group of prominent Christian clergy, ministry leaders, and scholars released the Manhattan Declaration on November 20, 2009 at a press conference in Washington, DC. The 4,700-word declaration speaks in defense of the sanctity of life, traditional marriage, and religious liberty. It issues a clarion call to Christians to adhere firmly to their convictions in these three areas.

Not a Compromiser

Some good friends of mine have decided not to sign this document for fear of giving the wrong impression, the impression of theological compromise. They believe that by signing it they would be supporting the furtherance of key doctrinal differences and error. Specifically, some have expressed fear that signing this document would show support for the Catholic church. However, that is not what this is about.

I have signed this document, as have many other solidly conservative evangelicals, such as Dr. Daniel Akin, Kay Arthur, Dr. Michael Easley, Dr. Al Mohler, Chuck Swindoll, and Ravi Zacharias. None of these people are promoting a different belief system, nor am I. But what we are doing is siding with others who hold to the same cherished beliefs regarding the sanctity of life, traditional marriage, and religious liberty.

Let Your Voice Be Heard

Please, just take a moment or two and read the Manhattan Declaration.  If you do not agree with it, then don’t sign it. If you do not support the values it promotes, then don’t sign it.

But, if you do agree with it….well, you know what to do.

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Filed under America, Christian Living, Christian Unity, Culture Wars, Defending Traditional Marriage, Defining Marriage, the future, World View

Hypocrisy and Porn

Warning: the following article may not be suitable for young people.

Questions

Is it a double standard to say a thing is completely acceptable, and then criminalize the use of the thing?

Is it hypocritical to say something is protected as free speech under the law, and then prohibit someone from listening or viewing the “speech”?

If something is deemed simply natural, not immoral or subject to the restrictions of an objective moral code, then is it acceptable to restrict someone from doing or partaking in what is simply “natural”?

These are honest questions. They are not meant to be leading. They are simply questions which I have been asking lately, because the double standard and hypocrisy are evident in our laws.

No Internet

For a while I have had the opportunity to counsel with a paroled sex offender. He is trying desperately to rebuild his life. He is completely repentant and wants to be the man God wants him to be, including provide for his family. The problem is the internet.

Almost everything we do these days, from sending emails to filling out applications, is done online. There are hardly any cell phones for sale that are not internet accessible. Yet, in the case of this man, he is not allowed to be on the internet – period. No phone, no computer, no iPad – nothing that will allow him internet access. Why? Because he might view pornography.

Excuse me? I thought pornography was perfectly legal. I thought pornography was protected as free speech. I thought that porn was safe, even good for one’s marriage. I thought porn was supposed to be art. Was I wrong?

Evidently, a convicted sex offender on parole is prohibited from viewing pornography because it might cause him to want to do sexually illegal things. Really?

Told You So

Now wait a minute! Haven’t we Christians being talking about the dangers of pornography for a while? Haven’t we said Scripture advises against such things? Sure! And here are just a few applicable verses:

But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. – Matthew 5:28 NKJV

Marriage [is] honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. – Hebrews 13:4 NKJV

I have made a covenant with my eyes; why then should I look upon a young woman? – Job 31:1 NKJV

Was the Bible wrong? Why is it that Christians and their pastors who preach the Bible are considered “Victorian” and backward? “The human body is a beautiful thing,” they say, “and you Christians are just prudes.”

No, God designed sex for marriage, not the gratification of anyone with internet access. And anyone who views pornography is not only lusting, which is a sin, but he is flirting with a ticking time bomb. Pornography IS dangerous. Pornography IS obscene. And pornography can lead a man to act out his fantasies when viewing them on a computer is no longer good enough.

My question is this: if it is so wrong for a sex offender to view it, all because it might tempt him to commit another sex crime, then why is it perfectly OK for everyone else to view it?

It’s called HYPOCRISY.

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18th on the 18th

Our Anniversary!

Eighteen years ago, today, I married the most beautiful woman in the world, Valerie Riddle. I am so glad she has stuck with me, even when I didn’t deserve it, which has been most of the time.

Valerie has asked me several times in the past, “If you could do it over again, would you still marry me?” To be honest, there were times when answering that question was difficult, especially back around 1999-2001. During that time I was going through the lowest time of my life; yet, she stood by me.

But if she were to ask me that question today, the answer would be a resounding “YES!”

It takes time!

So many people get divorced after a few years of marriage, never staying in it long enough to work through the hard times. In doing so, they miss out on the treasures that years of faithfulness bring. Because they give up too early, they uproot seeds before they have time to germinate, never being able to experience the fruit of a life-long relationship taking root.

I have so many other things to do, that my schedule is bursting at the seams. I don’t have time to be sitting at the computer posting pictures and telling the world about my love story. On the other hand, there is no better time than the present, because the time I have had with her has been the best present a man could ever receive.

I love you, Valerie. Happy anniversary!

It’s been a bumpy, but wonderful ride, so far. Thank you for staying in the car with me. I’m looking forward to the rest of the trip!

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Filed under Christian Living, Defending Traditional Marriage, Defining Marriage, Divorce, Life Lessons, Relationships and Family, the future

In Memory of Chuck Colson (1931-2012)

If you have never heard of Chuck Colson, that’s a real shame. Please follow the link I have provided and become aquainted with him, however belated that aquaintance may be.

Click Here.

Chuck went home to be with his Lord this morning, shortly after 3 am. He will be sorely missed.

Because of the efforts of Mr. Colson, many prisoners have come to know Christ, freedoms have been preserved, ethics have been championed, atheists have been challenged, and politicians have been held to account. May God raise up others to take his place.

In his honor, please go to the box on the right labeled Manhattan Declaration.” Please read the declaration and sign it. Make your voice heard in the fight for religious liberty in this country.

“One of the most wonderful things about being a Christian is that I don’t ever get up in the morning and wonder if what I do matters. I live every day to the fullest because I can live it through Christ and I know no matter what I do today, I’m going to do something to advance the Kingdom of God.”— Charles Colson

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Courageous: A Review

Could I recommend anything more highly than going to see Courageous?

Sure…here are a few examples:

  • Breath and exhale on a regular basis.
  • Take a potty break at least once a day.
  • Eat nutritious foods and drink hydrating, non-addictive fluids, if possible. But if none of these are available, feel free to eat McDonald’s chicken nuggets and swig down a tall Coca Cola product…you don’t want to starve.
  • Call your mother on Mother’s Day.

Other than that, I can’t think of too many things I would rather you do, especially if you are a man, than go see this movie. It is THAT good.

It’s a Wake-Up Call

From the people that made Facing the Giants and Fireproof comes a movie that should challenge every man to become the courageous leader he was meant to be. Much like a wake up call that resembles ice water in the face and banging trash cans at 0400 (that’s 4 am), Courageous will make any father worth his salt re-evaluate some things.

I will tell you, I was in tears for part of the movie, laughing in another part, tense in three parts, and under conviction the rest. And guys, when you take your wife, make sure you sit a seat away if she startles easily. And if you haven’t been the best husband, you’d better be prepared to make a change. You’ll know if you see her using napkins covered in popcorn “butter” and salt to wipe the tears away from her eyes.

It’s Worth the Ticket Price

Was the acting as good as can be found in an Oscar-winning motion picture? Probably not. But everything else was on par with anything Hollywood and it’s hedonistic values can pump out. Now that Sony has been putting some money into the production, the Kendrick brothers have been able to create a much higher quality product. So, don’t be fooled by critics into thinking its going to be a lame, evangelical, low-budget Church flick. It’s worth the price of a ticket in an HD theater.

Plot?

When it comes to the plot, I don’t want to give anything away you don’t already know. It’s about policemen, Mexican workers, drug dealers, death, life, and how a real father, not just a one-night-stand-er, can make a difference. It’s about modern day dads making a resolution to be “courageous.”

Favorite scene? Well, let’s just say it has to do with a chicken sandwich, waffle fries, a milkshake, and the Snake Kings.

A final thought. Even though many will still think of this movie as “preachy,” all because it promotes a solid message without resorting to sex, profanity, or any other Hollywood mainstay, one thing remains the same: the Kendrick brothers have not lost their focus. Just look at this quote from the end of a critical review in the Seattle Times:

[The] bigger message might be that the Kendricks haven’t sold out, “gone Hollywood” or watered down their beliefs to reach an audience beyond the faithful.

And God bless them!

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Filed under Defending Traditional Marriage, Defining Marriage, Divorce, General Observations, Life Lessons, Movie review