Category Archives: Relationships and Family

Topics related to how we deal with the people God has placed in our lives.

Hair Today, Grace Tomorrow

Battles

You have probably heard it said before, but sometimes you have to pick your battles. At least that’s a common saying when it comes to parenting. Of course, there are sometimes when the battle chooses you, but for the most part, we can decide which battle should take priority. When it comes to my daughter getting her hair cut, well, I’ve decided that is a battle I am willing to invest few resources.

The other day my youngest, Haley, came to me and told me that she wanted to have her hair cut – and I mean CUT! I must admit, the idea of my beautiful little girl having her pretty hair scissored from her head made me sad. On the other hand, I was not as mournfully brokenhearted as Katie, Haley’s older sister. But, when she explained to me why she wanted it cut, and what she wanted it to look like, I just said, “OK, whatever makes you happy.”

However, since we are talking “battles,” don’t think “whatever makes you happy” will always be my response – no sir! Like I said, there are some battles worth fighting, it’s just that this one was not it. I mean, should she have come to me and asked if she could get her hair nearly shaved off and spiked and colored purple? Uhh, no. That wouldn’t have happened. And should she have come to me and asked for a tongue stud, or a tramp stamp… you get the picture… NO! And I would fight those battles.

Believe me, there are FAR more battles worth waging on behalf of our children, far more than ones over how short their hair should be!

But all Haley wanted was to have her pretty hair cut and styled shorter…and I wanted her to be happy…and there was really nothing wrong with what she was wanting to do. It was just hair – it can grow back.

Grace

But here’s the thing, folks. Should my little Haley gone out and done something that made me angry, something of which I would have strongly disapproved, would that have changed the fact that she is my daughter?

NO! Absolutely not!

If Haley had gone and got that tattoo on her back, or the nose ring, or the spiked hair…or far worse…yes, I still would have loved her, even though, as her dad, I would have been ticked. I would have been disappointed for my own reasons, but I wouldn’t have kicked her out of the house; she’s my daughter.

And that’s the thing about real grace. God loves us enough to let us live, even if our life choices prove to be out of step with the norm, or not what others would like. We are not talking about sin, but individual choices and decisions of life, where there is no real right or wrong, just the opportunity to offend or hurt. God’s grace allows us to be ourselves, within his boundaries, because He actually DOES want us to be happy.

Thankfully, though, when the choices of a believer DO cross the line and become sin, our Heavenly Father may be quick to discipline us, but He never stops loving us…we are family…we are His children.

So, the hair may be gone today, but grace isn’t.

How It Happened – In Pictures

 

Here is Haley, hair intact, with the Follicle Vampire about to strike.

Here is Haley, hair intact, with the Follicle Vampire about to strike.

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I had to keep reminding myself it could grow back. On the other hand, I could make a wig out of that!

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The finished product: A selfie-worthy cut on a beautiful daughter.

 

 

 

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Filed under grace, legalism, Parenting, Relationships and Family

Misinterpreting Affection

This morning, while sitting in the parking lot of where I work, I wrote on a piece of lumber I still had in our van. 


I sent the picture, via text, to my wife. 

Valerie then responded with the following hand-written text…


Unsure how to interpret that, I responded with…


Maybe it would have been better if my loving, yet nauseated wife could have sent two separate texts. 

At least I think I understood what she was saying… Anyone else have an opinion?? 

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Filed under Humor, Marriage, Relationships and Family

Monday Monkey “Valentine’s Day Song” (Episode 15)

Since I couldn’t get anyone to be my actors and actresses in Wally-Mart, I decided to just draw my own music video.

A few years ago I wrote this song, Try Me, for my wife, Valerie. Yesterday was her birthday, and tomorrow is Valentine’s Day (the holiday she was named after), so I thought it would be appropriate to break out this older post (from 2012) featuring Mr. Monkey.

It is a Monday, you know.

If you’d like for me to perform this song at your next party, just give me a call 🙂

“Try Me”

Oh, by the way, my song IS protected under copyright laws, even though James Brown had a song by the same title back in the 1950’s.

 

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Filed under General Observations, Humor, Monday Monkey, music, Relationships and Family

Happy Birthday, Valentine!

valerieToday is my wife’s 50th birthday! Yes, she is 50, and I don’t care to tell people about it.

Does she care? I don’t think so. Why? Because she is the type that constantly quotes the words of Paul to the Thessalonians…she even concludes her emails with these verses:

Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. – 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

So, Happy Birthday to Valerie (because she was born so close to Valentine’s Day), the greatest Valentine a man could have ever received!

“Happy birthday, you’re so nifty, even if you’re hitting fifty! / Valerie, my Valentine, I’m so very glad you’re mine!”

Cheesy poetry is better than no poetry, right?

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Filed under Christian Maturity, Marriage, Relationships and Family

When Tomorrow Is Sunday

Never forget that the arguments, the hurt feelings, the illnesses, the stresses, and the pains that hit seemingly out of the blue are not coincidence when tomorrow is Sunday.  – A. Baker

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Filed under Christian Living, Christianity, Church, Life Lessons, ministry, Preaching, Relationships and Family

My Daughter’s Updated List (the “Arachnilist”)

Adding to the List

Not long ago I shared a list which one of my beautiful daughters sent to me. It was a list describing the qualities that must be present in the man who might be interested in relating with her.

Click HERE to read the previous post.

This morning she texted me a “sub-list” to the previous list, and I think it is worth sharing. If some young man does strike her fancy, he’d better not be a pajama boy.

“You know that list that I made for my qualifications for a special male friend??? Well the sub-list is as follows:

1. Cleans up after the dog.

2. Washes the dishes.

3. Cleans out the fridge.

4. Rids all windows of spiders.

spider-facts5. Rids house of spiders.

6. Rids garage of spiders.

7. Rids shed of spiders.

8. Comes to my aid when he does not fully complete his assignment of ridding said places of said eight-legged creature, regardless of the time or what he is tasking himself with upon the call.”

I’ve got a feeling she must have had a Monday-morning run-in with a dorm-dwelling arachnid. Notice both the spider and the list have eight points.

Sounds Familiar!

So, to sum up both lists, the guy must be a godly Christian who cooks, cleans, rubs feet, and kills spiders.  Seems she might be looking for a bi-vocational super-spiritual minister who’s done everything from restaurant work to pest control.

Hah! Isn’t that sweet? She wants a man just like her daddy! 😉

Except I hate rubbing feet. Just saying.

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Filed under Marriage, Parenting, Relationships and Family

My Daughter’s List

Don’t get me wrong – I’m not trying to get my daughter hitched. However, if you are a young man who can live up to Katie’s high standards, then let’s talk.

And believe me, we will talk first.

A few days ago my daughter Katie (age 20, not far from 21) sent me an email containing a list of what she wanted in a man. Unbelievably, even though she is now a senior at Bryan College, has a beautiful voice, is a fantastic photographer, and bubbles with a personality as lovely as her looks, she still has no marital prospects. Crazy, right?

What’s wrong with you guys??

Do you have, and can you do all the following?

  1. katie-before-the-banquet-at-bryanHas a heart that wants to serve God in every way and serves to refine my heart for Christ
  2. Patient
  3. Respectful to all people and animals
  4. Wants to honor my family
  5. Respects and honors my body
  6. Has a love for children
  7. Lives a healthy lifestyle and encourages me to do the same
  8. Will be respectful of my dietary requirements
  9. Has a strong work ethic with a reasonable plan for life
  10. Will willingly give quality massages (primarily on feet and neck) upon request and out of self will

If you are interested in becoming my son-in-law, you’ll figure out how to get in touch with me. Then, if I think you might possibly make her happy, I’ll forward the info. She has the final word, though.

Any takers?

Oh! I do have a badge (so I have connections), and I firmly believe in the 2nd Amendment. Just FYI.

Visiting Bryan to hear Katie sing her first solo with the choir and full orchestra. She sang Vivaldi.

Visiting Bryan to hear Katie sing her first solo with the choir and full orchestra. She sang Vivaldi.

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Filed under Life/Death, Marriage, Parenting, Relationships and Family