by | August 11, 2012 · 9:55 pm

Late-Nite Saturday Rant

In the Dark

I’m sitting in the dark on an empty school bus, waiting for a high school football team to finish playing. I have 29% battery on my iPhone, and I want to read my real Bible, not an app.

So, since it is dark (28%, now), I will blog in the dark. At least until I get to 20%.

Things that Irritate

A lot of people have used their blogs to gripe about things they hate, or things that irritate them (27%). Therefore, because I just heard something that irritated me when I watched a video on Socialcam, I will share some of my dislikes. Why not?

…..the limited capabilities of WordPress’s smartphone app.

…..(26%) people that won’t sing a well-known song to the beat, but delay the lyrics in order to appear more spiritual (’cause it doesn’t make them sound better).

…..when there is a hole in one slice of bread and the jelly on my peanut butter and jelly sandwich leaks onto my hand.

…..(25%) mosquitoes.

…..cat hair in my throat (or any hair) that won’t wash down or cough up, but just sticks there.

…..a sunburn on my bald head.

…..(24%) no car charger for my phone while on a field trip.

…..reporters that ask to interview me, then distort the truth, making me look bad.

Oh great! The team is done. I’m cranking up the bus. I have light!

Going Home

Well, I now have 23% battery on my phone, but now it’s time to go home. I’ve got to make sure everything’s ready for the road.

Hope everybody goes to church somewhere this Sunday. You’re welcome to visit ours and hear me preach. If you do, that will NOT irritate me.

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by | August 7, 2012 · 3:33 pm

It Does Get Serious

I Love to Laugh

All who really know me know I love to laugh. They know I love to joke around, even when it’s not expected. Sometimes I can find the strangest things humorous.

Sometimes my sense of humor can get me into trouble. My wife has given me the “evil eye” on more than one occasion. She could tell you of many times when what I thought something was funny, but others did not.

I Love Comedy

If you have seen my Monday Monkey videos you have figured out I like stupid comedy. I am a kid at heart that likes to smile. What would life be like without a good joke? What would life be like without Bill Cosby, Steve Martin, Bill Murray, Tim Allen, or Tim Hawkins? I even like Will Ferrell and Eddie Murphy at times.

I’m On Mission

But no matter how much I love to laugh and have fun; no matter how many monkey videos I make; I am still on mission for the Lord. And one thing is for sure, now as much as ever, doing God’s will, especially in the area of ministry, is not for the faint of heart.

I was working on a paper today when the words I wrote spoke back at me. The last few weeks have brought many trials and heartbreaks. Just this week I have dealt with (either personally or on behalf of others) character attacks, physical pain, financial stress, divorce, infidelity, abuse, cancer, court trials, death, and political turmoil. There is more to my life, and there’s more to ministry, than monkeys…believe me.

Sometimes life can be hard. And those going into ministry need to know that being “on God’s payroll” doesn’t make it any easier, either. That is why I found myself writing the following paragraph on the opening page of a paper dealing with conflict. I hope it serves as a warning, but also as a reminder that our God is in control, even when no one’s laughing.

“One thing should always be taught to those young men (and women) entering ministry – it’s a battle, and people will get hurt. Many enter into ministry with grand allusions of glorious and easy sailing, the wind behind their backs, and starry nights guiding the way. What they don’t know is that ahead of them lay stormy seas, contrary winds, and nights so dark no guiding light can be seen. Ministry can be full conflict; yet all is not hopeless. We walk with One who walks on waves. We talk with One who calms the winds. And when it’s too dark to see the way, we can trust the Unseen Hand.”

I serve a Mighty God who is awesome to save! He is my strength and my strong tower. In Him will I hide. Under His banner will I go forward unto victory. Praise the Lamb!

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by | August 6, 2012 · 12:03 am

Monday Monkey (#26) and the 300th Post!

Last week it was 20,000 views.

This week it is our

300th Post!

Yaaaaayyyyy!

And, to beat all, the 300th post on The Recovering Legalist is not going to be serious or controversial, but fun and educational. It’s a Monday Monkey video!

Vacation

This week my family and I went out of town for a couple of days. We went to Huntsville and Decatur, Alabama. While in Decatur we stayed at the Marriott Courtyard and had a half tank of gasoline stolen, ate barbecue, went to my old employer’s bug museum, and tried to work on several papers that need to be completed before week’s end.

Hey, for the record, I normally use iMovie to do my video, but then end of this video features a piece done on the Socialcam app.

Also, here’s a shout out and hello to Gage, a little boy we met in Cook’s Natural Science Museum. He was brave enough to have his picture made with a weird man and a monkey, but his little brother chickened out. And also for the record, his mom gave us permission to take the picture. Thank’s to the mom and granny persons 🙂

Also, on our way home, we drove by the U. S. Space and Rocket Center in Huntsville.

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by | August 5, 2012 · 12:23 am

Estonia

Hard Life

This week I want you to pray for one of the most prosperous and free countries in Europe, Estonia. If you are not familiar with this country, then go to a world map, find the Baltic Sea, and then look south of Finland and east of Sweden. There it will be, a small part of the former Soviet Union.

And speaking of former stuff, I was reading the history of Estonia on Wikipedia and found myself cringing and wincing. Those poor people went through some horrible, horrible years. Just in the last century, wars, occupations, and deportations killed off way over 25% of the population. In WWII Estonia suffered tremendously, first under the Soviets, then the Nazis. After the war things didn’t get much better.

Good Life

The great thing is that Estonia is now very prosperous. The national debt is only 6%. Estonia is considered a high-income economy by the World Bank. The country is ranked 16th in the 2012 Index of Economic Freedom, with the freest economy in Eastern Europe and the former Soviet Union (see Wikipedia – which is well-sourced).

Godless Life

But the sad thing is that the great majority of Estonians are unbelievers. According to studies quoted by the Wikipedia article, on 16% of Estonians believe an ANY god, much less the God of the Bible. The largest religious group is Evangelical Lutheranism (14.6%).

Pray for Estonia, and pray for this blog. Thanks to the internet there are some people coming to The Recovering Legalist and hopefully reading about a God that love them and wants to offer them hope.

A Prayer

Lord, I am sure you are aware of the people of Estonia. I am sure you have sheep of your pasture in that little country. But dear Father, please send workers into that field who can bring more sheep into your Fold. May the Estonians see that a new life in You is nothing like the cold, lifeless religion so many hate. May they see Jesus.

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by | August 3, 2012 · 3:39 pm

20,000 Milestone Reached

Today is a special day!

This afternoon I officially broke the 20,000 views mark!

Thanks, folks! Thanks to all the regular subscribers, the occasional readers, and even the ones who hate everything about me and all I believe.

I know that to some 20,000 is a drop in the bucket. But on the other hand, I appreciate every view, whether it is counted as a “hit,” or not (many are not).

Again, thank you very much for each time you take the time to read this blog.

To God be the glory, great things He hath done!

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by | August 2, 2012 · 10:25 pm

My Take on Chick-fil-A

The Story

If you haven’t heard about Chick-fil-A and what happened August 1, 2012, then you’re probably living under a rock. This privately-owned fast-food restuarant chain broke all sales records as people from all over the country showed up to support them by buying their food. It was called “Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day.”

Now, what got all this started was an outcry by the liberal and LGBT crowd. They were made aware of a statement made by Dan Cathy to the Baptist Press (a Southern Baptist news paper) regarding his views on same-sex marriage – he’s against it. When they heard this, a call was made to boycott Chick-fil-A. In response to the call for a boycott, millions did the opposite.

The Craziness

What is really crazy about all of this is the argument behind all the hate towards Chick-fil-A. Those protesting have made erroneous, unfounded accusations that the resturant chain discriminates toward homosexuals. What a load of, well, chicken poo!

The thing that is making people on the left angry is the simple fact that Dan Cathy expressed a belief that disagrees with the pluralistic, post-modern, hedonistic, amoral segment of society – and he is a wealthy, conservative Baptist. So, because of an individual’s personal beliefs, the left, including politicians, want to punish a legitimate, non-discriminatory business.

I have heard it said over and over, “Chick-fil-A hates gays!” How is that even defensible! In order for that to be true, we should be seeing gays turned away or offered poor service. In order for that to be true, we should be reading of multiple, nation-wide examples of discrimination in the work place. None of that can be found. The accusation is totally bogus.

Can’t Win for Losing

Then there are those who are griping and complaining over the response from communities nation-wide. Believe it or not, there are believers in Christ (who themselves disapprove of gay marriage and support Dan Cathy’s right to express his opinion) condemning all of those who showed up to support the unfounded condemnation of Chick-fil-A. What’s the deal?

How many times have we heard it preached that it is time for the Christians to stand up for what they believe? Then, when they do, what do we hear? We hear, “The Church has failed…We should stay out of politics…They’re just out to get free food.” Aside from the fact that it wasn’t just Christians showing up yesterday, it was people who were expressing their support for a business.

My Decision

This is what I am going to do. Tomorrow (Friday) I am going to drive our church van to a couple of different Chick-fil-A locations, look for any gays or lesbian kissing in public, and offer to buy their food. I am going to go with a $100 budget.

You see, the whole argument against Cathy and Chick-fil-A, and all Christians, is that we hate gays. Sure, there are some idiots who do, just like there are hateful people on all sides, but as a whole we don’t. What we hate is sin. What we hate is being forced to accept something we firmly believe to be wrong. What we hate is being unjustifiably attacked and maligned. We do not hate gays.

For the Record

God made man (generically speaking) in His image, which makes each individual precious in God’s eyes. Jesus even gave His life so that those who hated Him could be forgiven and offered eternal life. If I were to hate homosexuals, how could I claim to be a follower of Jesus? But does this mean I agree with the act of homosexuality? No. Do I believe that marriage, an institution ordained by God to be a covenant between a man and a woman, should be expanded to include the union of same sexes? No. What it does mean is that I will seek to love people like Jesus did.

So, if you want to show the love of Christ in a tangible way, do what I am going to do. Show those who have claimed we hate them that we actually do love them. If you see a couple of men kissing in a Chick-fil-A, go up to them and tell you that you want to show them that you do love them, and in the Name of the One who first showed you love, buy them the best chicken sandwich known to man.

Romans 5:8 – But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

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by | August 1, 2012 · 1:15 am

Interview Questions

A Great Idea

I was just reading the blog of a new subscriber, Jessie Clemence. One of her posts consisted of an interview conducted by herself. That gave me an idea – why not interview ME?

Yes, I think it would be fun to conduct an in-depth, newsworthy interview with myself. I could ask all the right questions, none of the wrong ones, and make myself look pretty darn impressive.

The only downside to interviewing myself is that if I am the only one asking the questions, then I might get mad at myself for prying too much. I would hate to make myself so angry that I never talk to myself again.

Your Questions

So, why don’t you help me interview myself by suggesting some questions myself could ask me?

Do you have questions about my past? My favorite things? Where I was on the night of June 18, 1994? My connection with MI6? What kind of man fights in Hawaiian shirts?

Keep the questions clean, of course, or myself will have to delete them.

If this interview goes well, I may have to do one with Mr. Monkey. Now that would be interesting.

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by | July 31, 2012 · 3:46 pm

Anthony’s Appetite #9 (Home Made Icing)

Store vs. Home

There are some things that are better bought from a store than made at home. I know saying that will make some people angry, but it’s true. I can think of a few things right off the bat…

  • Captain Crunch Cereal – I especially like Crunch Berries.
  • Peanut Butter – sure, you can make it at home, but it gets nasty after a while.
  • Crackers – has anyone ever made a cracker better than a Nabisco Saltine?
  • Nilla Wafers – another winner from Nabisco. Put peanut butter on these and it’s the closest thing to manna from heaven.
  • Instant Coffee – have you ever tried to freeze-dry your own?

Birthday Cake

Last week we celebrated the twelfth birthday of our little Kung Fu queen, Haley. For her party she wanted a cake to coincide with her selected “Ip Man” theme (Ip Man was famous for introducing Wing Chun to the world). We had her picture made on rice paper for decoration, but the best part was the icing.

Icing

When it comes to cake icing, my wife makes the best in the world. And so do I – ’cause I used her recipe. She baked the cake for the party, but I mixed the icing.

Included in the recipe is butter, shortening, cream cheese, powdered sugar, and flavoring. This time the flavoring consisted of a mixture of almond and vanilla extract.

Because the cake was fairly large, I had to make a large bowl of icing, part of which needed to be colored pink.

Home Made vs. Canned

You can buy decent cake icing from a store, but it doesn’t even come close to the flavor and quality of what can be made at home. My wife’s cream cheese icing is smoother, creamier, tastier, and moist-ier. As a matter of fact, her icing can even make a bad cake taste better, saving the baker from embarrassment.

If you’d like the recipe, just email me. I’d love to hear from you. Then, come back here to let everyone know how good it actually is.

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by | July 30, 2012 · 12:30 am

Monday Monkey “Olympic Hopeful” (Episode 26)

Olympic Connection

To start off this post, I just want to say how happy I am to see that my alma mater was represented to the world this week.

If you missed it, Amber Charles, a senior at Tennessee Temple University in Chattanooga, TN, was one of the torchbearers who lit the Olympic cauldron in London. Amber is the captain of the ladies basket ball team. Both she and the coach, incidentally, are from London.

Monkey Connection

One of the best over-the-counter teas is non other than PG Tips. According to their advertising, PG Tips is England’s #1 tea, and they have a puppet monkey to prove it.

Our family loves PG Tips, and we have a world-famous puppet monkey in our house. Coincidence?

Athlete Connection

London, Monkeys, Tea…and athletics. What many don’t know is that Mr. Monkey can pole vault. Give him a little duct tape and he can really impress with bamboo pole.

I don’t know when the next Olympic trial will be held, but someone should give us a call. Do they have three-legged racing?

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by | July 29, 2012 · 1:00 am

Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Island Hopping

One day I would like to island hop through the Caribbean. There are so many beautiful places to see, including the tiny island nation of Saint Vincent and the Grenadines. No surprise, in 2011 it was named one of the top 5 places to visit in the Caribbean by Travel and Leisure.

If I were Superman, all I would have to do would be to jump really hard from the coast of Florida, sneer down at Castro as I flew over Cuba, and land just short of Grenada and Venezuela. If I did that, I would probably land in Kingstown, the capital of Saint Vincent and the Grenadines.

However, if I were a pirate (or at least a man who played one on TV), I could head to SVG to film a movie with Jack Sparrow. Believe it or not, this is where The Pirates of the Caribbean was filmed.

More Views Wanted

I have had only one registered view from this little country, but I’d like to have more. Considering that I have a decent relationship with a few people in England, and since SVG’s head of state is Queen Elizabeth II, we should get along. For crying out loud, I even like one of their main exports, bananas.

Pray

Say a prayer for the people of Saint Vincent and the Grenadines. They have been hit with a lot of tragedy over the last few years, much of which has hurt their fragile economy. Storms and volcanic eruptions have adversely affected their plantations. Right now unemployment is just short of 20%.

Remember, too, that even though much of this country is considered Protestant, many in the interior still need Christ. Pray that God will raise up indigenous pastors to lead in those areas.

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