The Recovering Legalist

by Anthony Baker | January 23, 2014 · 11:10 pm

Thursday Thoughts (Who Knew?)

Hello, dear friends and subscribers (both friend and evil, stalking foe)! It is another Thursday evening where I am, and boy is it getting cold! Cold, I tell you! Explanation point!

So, what is on my mind? Oh, nothing too much, only the fact that I am now the wearied owner of a new label: Bible corrector.

Yes, according to someone on Facebook with the last name of LaRue, I am…

“…a Bible corrector. At least that’s settled. You can take your Egyptian mentality and shove it.”

A Bible corrector? Yes, a Bible corrector.

And according to other comments, I’m not a Bible believer, either. No, I am but an “apostate” Bible corrector with an “Egyptian mentality” evidently capable of being inserted into my nether regions. Eeeeewwww!

But why?

Receiving the Theology Award from Temple Baptist Seminary

Why is this preacher…this defender of the faith…this hated conservative…this herald of God’s grace…this humble little Baptist fuzzball…not a believer, but a correcter? Simple…I dared to suggest a word in the King James Version of the Bible could be amplified by a closer study of the original Greek (New Testament).

I mean, seriously! Who knew that suggesting κεράτιον (translated as “husks” in Luke 15:16) might be something other than what covers an ear of corn could be equal to getting in bed with Beelzebub?

Therefore, instead of an Independent, Fundamental, Bible-believing Baptist, I’m a Non-autonomous (cause I’m Southern Baptist), Convoluted, Bible-correcting, Apostate Egyptian. And all this time I thought I was following Christ.

That’s not a cross I’m carrying?

Who knew?

Underwear Is the Answer?

WARNING! I am going to be talking about underwear (and other things). Some may find the following subject material inappropriate, so proceed at your own risk.

The other day one of my daughters sent me a video advertisement from a company called AR Wear. What were they trying to sell? Anti-rape underwear.

Anti-rape underwear…

(If you want to see the video, you can go look it up on YouTube.)

OK, so….

For the record, I believe rape is a horrible crime. Furthermore, I think predatory rapists should suffer punishments akin to those dished out in the Old Testament. Therefore, please don’t misunderstand me…if you want to wear anti-rape underwear, go for it!

However, what disturbs me is that there is evidently a market for anti-rape underwear, a market partially characterized by a lack of wisdom and common sense.

Below is the text from the first couple of minutes of the AR Wear video advertisement…

“Have you ever been out walking at night, alone, wishing you could feel safer? And you, parents and friends, how often have you worried about a loved one? We want to provide a product that will make women and girls feel safer when out on a first date, or a night of clubbing, taking an evening run, traveling in another country, or in other potentially risky situations.

The challenge was to find a way for the garment to be worn comfortably during normal activities, yet still be able to frustrate an attack…even if the person wearing it had too much to drink, was drugged, or asleep.

Seriously? I mean, really? Am I overreacting to the obvious?

Again, anything that will prevent a woman from being violated is a good thing, so I totally applaud the product AR Wear is trying to sell. But, just look at the people to whom they are trying to market. Are there not other options that could be utilized before resulting to rape-resistant undergarments?

Humor this old man for just a moment and think about the following words…

“Have you ever been out walking at night, alone, wishing you could feel safer?” Ladies, here is a suggestion: don’t go out walking alone at night! And if you must, why not invest in some mace or pepper spray, a German Shepherd, or even a .45 cal. semi-automatic! Believe me, if you are packing heat while walking Cujo, it will probably be the rapist who’ll need to be changing his underwear.
“[Safer] when out on a first date.“ Let’s think about this one for a moment, OK? Shouldn’t you do your homework on a guy before going out with him? [For additional thoughts on this, see the comments]
A “night of clubbing,” or “other potentially risky situations.“ Again, seriously? Is anti-rape underwear really that necessary? How about let’s just avoid the nights of “clubbing” and passing out on the dance floor or in the back seat of a stranger’s car?! Good grief!
Normal activities that include: “even if the person wearing [the underwear] had too much to drink, was drugged, or asleep.” I’m sorry, but if your normal activities include having too much to drink, getting drugged, and passing out, then you have problems that a pair of armored panties will never fix.

I don’t want to sound harsh, my friends, but it would seem that much of the need for the above product could be eliminated by smarter, wiser, more godly life choices.

Sure, there are times when bad things happen no matter what we do, but what should one expect from a lifestyle that includes regular excessive drinking, drug use, and “risky situations?”

The fact that anti-rape underwear is needed at all is sad enough. But when we add in the fact that much of the demand stems from unwise behavior, the whole idea seems tragically fatalistic.

6 Comments

Filed under abuse, America, Christian Living, Culture Wars, current events, General Observations, wisdom

Tagged as assault, behavior, dating, underwear

by Anthony Baker | January 16, 2014 · 9:43 pm

Thursday Thoughts (Cars, Stress, and Dead Actors)

Good Thursday, everyone! I hope that you are looking forward to a wonderful weekend starting with a wonderful Friday. And no matter how many times I say the name of that day, I think of the song by Rebecca Black.

So, before it is too late and this post has to become a “Forgetful Friday” edition, let me leave you with some random Thursday thoughts.

1. I don’t like new cars. New cars and all their technology have progressed beyond my comfort zone. The newest automobile I have ever owned was a 2005 model. Do you realize how much has changed since then? I don’t even know what most of the buttons on a new car do! There’s nowhere to play a cassette tape, either!

Owner’s manuals used to be something only for those who couldn’t change a tire without instructions, but not any more. Now the new owner’s manuals come with a diploma once completed. Do I sound like an old man?

Checking out a vehicle we didn’t buy. Still looking.

2. Shopping for an automobile is stressful. Honestly, I can think of only a handful of things that can lead a couple any closer to the brink of divorce than shopping for a new car. It is far worse, too, when all we can afford is one vehicle. Can you guess who has to be the happiest with any decision? Can you guess who will not get something that has even one tiny little testosterone hormone stashed under a seat? Pure stress, I tell you! Pure stress!!

As much as a hate the idea of a totalitarian system of government, there is something to be said of a country that allows only one kind of car to be made and sold to its people. But then again, couples would fight over the color, if not the scent of the air freshener.

3. Some old actors died. Did you hear that Russell Johnson (the Professor on “Gilligan’s Island”) died today? He was 89! And did you hear that Dave Madden, the man who played Reuben Kincaid (the manager) on “The Partridge Family” died? He was 82! Isn’t it amazing how reruns on television make us think these guys are still as young as they were back in the 1960’s and ’70’s?

Dave Madden, 1973

By the way, did you know that Dave Madden was one of the voices on Focus On the Family’s children’s radio program, “Adventures in Odyssey?” He was the voice of Bernard Walton, and he will be missed.

They always say famous people die in “threes.” If that is so, I wonder who will be next? I have my guesses. Do you?

Please pray that we will find a car, SOON!

5 Comments

Filed under blogging, General Observations

Tagged as Automobile, Dave Madden, Family, Focus on the Family, Rebecca Black, Reuben Kincaid, Shopping

by Anthony Baker | January 13, 2014 · 12:22 pm

Favorites of the 500

Favorite Posts

I first started blogging back in 2009. Since then I have written over 500 posts, but many have all but been forgotten – out of sight, out of mind.

Therefore, I have gone back and picked several of my favorites from the first couple of years and listed them below. I hope you will have the time to look at a few, especially the ones specifically dealing with legalism (my pet subject).

The Doctrine of Separation Examined (Where most of my Independent Baptist friends and I – I’m Baptist, too – disagree the most)
Why Be a Legalist?
Prostitots? (One of my most in-your-face, no-punches-pulled posts)
Does Divorce Disqualify? (Very controversial post)
What to Wear to Church? (Many people should read this, then send a copy to everyone in their church!)
Study to Show Thyself Approved On a Survey
Smoking: The Legalists Are Alive and Well
Let God Be True, and Luther a Liar
The Recovering Legalist Meets Building 429 (My first mega-hit piece, thanks to the band putting this on their website 😉 )
The REAL Problem With the Problem of Evil (Pretty much a personal essay on the problem of evil)
“You might be a legalist if…” (Did Jeff Foxworthy write this?)
Anthony’s Appetite #6 (Marinated Herring) (I used to be an amateur food critic)
You Call THAT a Church?
Don’t Be Skeerd (my own list) (A funny list at what Christians should NOT be afraid of)
Monday Monkey Meets Benny Berry (I still get teary-eyed when I watch this!)

3 Comments

Filed under blogging, General Observations, Independent Baptist, legalism

Tagged as blogging, History, Humor, Legalism

by Anthony Baker | January 10, 2014 · 1:30 pm

Forgetful Fridays (500th post!)

Thursday Thoughts

Last week I decided it would be fun to start a new series of posts entitled “Thursday Thoughts.” Then, just like clockwork, I forgot to write anything when Thursday came back around.

Last Thursday I wrote about several things that had been on my mind, but things I didn’t want to spend a lot of time treating individually. But this time, instead of on Thursday, I will use today (Friday) to vent my mind. The things I forgot to mention on Thursday will now be mentioned on a Friday, hence “Forgetful Fridays.”

Things I Forgot

The following are some things I have been thinking about (about which I have been thinking?). Most are stories that have either been in the news or on the world wide web of lies.

“Concrete Endangerment”

If you live in Germany, I feel sorry for you; evidently you have a government that still harbors a secret love of Hitler’s old ways. You have taken the Wunderlich’s children away from them indefinitely out of fear that they may, of all the horrible things in the world, HOMESCHOOL them! O.M.G.!!! A German judge ruled that homeschooling constitutes “concrete endangerment” of children. Really?

The Wunderlich family. Children taken by German government.

However, if you live in America (like I do), a country run by liberals who idolize totalitarian governments where one man controls all, then I feel sorry for you, especially if you educate your children at home (like we do). How long do you think it will be before our Justice Department will attempt to mirror German judges? Has not our own Attorney General Holder determined that the Romeikes should return to Germany, even though the government will take away their children when they return?

Click here to read the whole news story from WND.

“Rage Spiral”

Have you ever gotten into a “rage spiral?” I have had days when one thing built upon another until I “lost it” and burst out with anger. I don’t know what it would take to send me down a spiraling vortex of rage. However, I do know what it takes to send the producer of HBO’s “Girls” into a “rage spiral.”

Lena Dunham

I don’t watch HBO, so I have never seen the comedy of which I speak. All I know is what I can gather from the news, and most of that tells me “Girls” is a debauched, nudity-filled bunch of garbage. But when a reporter questioned why the creator and director of the program, Lena Dunham, had to get naked so often that the producer, Jenni Konner, said she went into a “rage spiral.”

Stop and think about it! A woman goes ballistic, she gets all indignant, all because a reporter questioned why there was so much nudity in her television program! Now, to be fair the “hit piece” was intentionally cruel with regards to Lena Dunham’s body, and was rightfully labeled “inappropriate” by Konner. But what is more inappropriate, criticizing a naked woman’s body, or parading it around for profit? Good grief!

“Satanic Statue”

Talk about spiraling descents into total insanity and rage, where has the nation of our Founding Fathers gone? Not only do we have people who object to a Ten Commandments monument on the grounds of the Oklahoma state capital, but now the Satanists want their own monument right beside it – and we’re supposed to approve!

There used to be a day when something like this would not only be laughed out of the public forum, but those suggesting such a thing would be run out on a rail. This is not what our founders envisioned when they wrote our Constitution. This is not what they were thinking when they spoke of “freedom of religion.” And it was definitely NOT Satan who was being spoken of as the “Creator” who endows us with “certain unalienable rights.”

So here’s my thought on this: will the creators of the Satanic monument be upset or proud if/when their goat statue gets vandalized? I mean, wouldn’t that show that their followers were only acting out their individual, self-god beliefs? Unbelievable! except in a world that’s already on its way to hell in a hand-basket. I wonder if there’ll be monuments there?

A Quote from Billy

“If God doesn’t soon bring judgment upon America, He’ll have to go back and apologize to Sodom and Gomorrah!” – Billy/Ruth Graham

I totally agree.

Vaccines and Veterans

Vaccines

Have you ever gotten a flu shot (vaccine)? I got one, yesterday. So far I have not come down with any complications, only a slightly sore shoulder. Will I die? Eventually, I suppose, but probably not from the vaccine.

I have had other vaccines, too. I’ve been vaccinated against polio, the mumps, whooping cough, tetanus, and many more I can’t think of right now. What would our world be like had there never been any? Scary to think about, isn’t it?

A Needed Vaccine

However, there is a disease which sadly affects billions of people worldwide, causing pain, suffering, and even death, for which there IS a vaccine, but few will accept it.

Like other vaccines, including the flu shot I received, there are a lot of people who think the vaccine is dangerous and can cause more harm than good, so they are very vocal in their opposition. Their opposition, which includes statistics, testimonials, and even mockery causes many to turn away from much needed relief.

What is the disease? It goes by several names:

Stupidity
Foolishness
Ignorance

What is the vaccine? Taken in any amount, the book of Proverbs (in the Bible) is capable of rooting out and eliminating the stupidity virus. And here’s the best part – NO needles!

The Veteran

But while I was at the pharmacy, I saw an old man wearing a hat that said, “WWII Veteran”. I decided to talk with him, to find out a little about him, and to thank him for his service.

George Palmer was his name. He joined the Navy in 1940 when he was 18. His first duty station was aboard the USS Texas, which is currently the last surviving battleship from the super dreadnought days of WWI. He was on the Texas when the War broke out and told me how he remembered being called to battle stations when the news of the attack on Pearl Harbor came.

Mr. Palmer later served on several other ships, including two destroyers, one of which was sunk underneath him. He saw naval conflict in both the Atlantic and Pacific, staying in the navy until 1946. He said, “The good Lord was watching over me.”

When I asked if I could have my picture taken with him, he smiled and graciously approved. When I pulled out my iPhone, he said, “Isn’t that amazing?! That’s just amazing!”

No, Mr. Palmer, it’s men like you that are amazing. Thank you for your service.

My Fear

Aside from needles, and getting too close to Miley Cyrus, my fear is that the world is creeping closer and closer to another conflict, but without the men and women of “the greatest generation” to bail us out.

We used to be a nation with a moral compass that set our course of action. Now we are a pluralistic, even godless nation with no sense of purpose, no sense of right and wrong, and no moral basis on which to stand against Tyranny in any form.

My fear is that the last of the vaccinated generation will soon be gone, and then the virus will consume us all. God help us.

Click here for a link to the USS TEXAS

3 Comments

Filed under America, Christian Maturity, Culture Wars, Life Lessons, the future, wisdom

Tagged as USS Texas, Vaccination, vaccine, veterans, wisdom, WWII

by Anthony Baker | January 6, 2014 · 1:24 am

Walk Slowly (another Monday Monkey episode!)

Surely you have seen it…the heroes of a movie walking slowly toward the screen.

Remember The Right Stuff? Remember how the astronauts, wearing their space suits, walked slowly through the steam?

Remember the scene in the 2005 movie Kicking and Screaming where Will Ferrell and his young soccer team, covered in blood after a day at the butcher shop, walked onto the field? They walked slowly, of course, and scared the other team into forfeiting.

Whenever want to make an on-screen impression that says, “I’m bad and I mean business,” walk toward the camera in slow motion. It never fails.

Oh! I almost forgot! You’ve also got to have some cool music with some punch and a good bass riff as a background track. Fortunately for me, iMovie had one I could use 😉

That’s why today’s Monday Monkey, the 1st one of 2014, kicks “beehind” (Baptist dirty word) and takes names.

Walk Slowly

9 Comments

Filed under animals, General Observations, Humor, Monday Monkey

Tagged as funny, iMovie, iPhone movie, Legalism, Monday Monkey, video, Will Ferrell

by Anthony Baker | January 2, 2014 · 11:42 am

Thursday Thoughts

Today is January 2 (or 2 January, if you prefer), 2014. It is a cold, rainy day in Chattanooga, Tennessee, yet I have already been out and walked a mile and a half before my first cup of coffee. No resolutions – just doing what needs to be done.

Thursdays

Today is also Thursday…the day after Wednesday…the day before Friday…but I am not going to break out into a Rebecca Black song (although I know you want me to). No, I am going to keep my singing to myself; only my written voice will be heard.

Thursday is a day that is not quite the end of the week, but on the downhill slide from Wednesday, the middle of the week. Nothing much happens on Thursday, does it? Thursday feels like a “filler” used to make the week complete.

New Stuff

So, since it’s been a long while since I started any new series of posts, I figure why not make Thursday my random thought day? Why not make Thursday – that innocuous, boring, non-essential filler – the day when I speak my mind about whatever has been in the news that week and tick off a whole bunch of liberals? Sounds like fun, doesn’t it?

Why don’t we start with some random thoughts about family?

Carlos and Rebecca (my sister) Gomes

My sister (yes, I have a sister) lives in Germany and is married to a German. Therefore, I have a German brother-in-law, which is strange to think about in the light of the memory that I used to pretend to fight Germans while playing “army” as a child. I wonder what he thinks of George S. Patton?
One of my daughters is going to college (away from home) next year, and that leaves me in a perpetual bad mood.
All of my daughters like boys – which is good – but it makes my perpetually bad mood more dangerous, especially when they start talking about invitations and cake.

Here are some thoughts of mine regarding new laws that go into effect this week:

Doing away with incandescent light bulbs is completely asinine.
Allowing boys and girls in California to choose which restrooms and locker rooms they wish to use is a recipe for sexual disaster and evidence that a perverted, sick, debauched spirit is behind an agenda to destroy the fabric of moral society. And if it is now law in California, don’t think it won’t be proposed in your own state.
A couple of states have now legalized the recreational use of marijuana. Now all the potheads can pack up and move from Tennessee! If we could only get Washington and Oregon to legalize crack cocaine and Meth, our whole drug-using community would head west!
I have not purchased Obamacare.

Books

I am going to try to read more this year, and one book that I have already started and will finish before the end of next week is The Measure of Our Success: An Impassioned Plea to Pastors (by Shawn Lovejoy). My wife saw this book on the shelf in a discount store. It only cost $5, so if it is not all that great I won’t be out much. However, from what I have already read, the author makes some painful and convicting observations.

The idea of the book is that we pastors need to quit gauging our success by anything or anyone other than what God has planned for our particular ministries. Here’s an intriguing quote from page 23: “I am more convinced than ever before that most churches are not supposed to be large.” What do you think about that?

Enough for Today

Well, I could keep going and going and going, but I am already up to 602 words, and hardly anyone will read a blog post this long unless they are stalkers, true fans, or looking for something incriminating.

Check back next Thursday, if not before, to see what’s on my mind (or driving me crazy).

The Death Of The Incandescent Light Bulb (sayanythingblog.com)

1 Comment

Filed under blogging, current events, Defending Traditional Marriage, General Observations, Relationships and Family

Tagged as California, Germany, Oregon, Patton George S, Rebecca Black, restroom, Tennessee

by Anthony Baker | January 1, 2014 · 12:01 am

Happy 2014!

I am sure you have heard it before now, but happy new year!

2013 was tough, but 2014 is a whole new ball game. So, let’s get out on the field and go for the goal.

God bless each of you, even those who disagree with me. May you have an ever-growing sense His presence.

Try not to have too much fun as you party. Just kidding. Or, maybe not (I’m still recovering, you know).

My Shepherd Will Lead

I wish I could tell you how difficult this last year has been, but I wouldn’t want to depress you. I mean, unless you are covered by some wonderful insurance plan that Obama has not already cancelled (because all plans but his are worthless), you probably can’t afford the anti-depressants and counseling.

Oh, sure, it hasn’t been all bad. And, if I were to put things in perspective, compared to others around the world my circumstances have been a walk in the park. But let me tell you, it’s been a long walk in a park that needs some serious repair.

So, with that being said, I would like to share with you the message I preached on the morning of December 29, the last Sunday in 2013. As late as two nights earlier I was in a real battle, but God picked me up and gave me the strength to throw it right back in the Devil’s face. I hope what you hear will be an encouragement to you as we face 2014.

Psalm 23 is often referred to as the Shepherd’s psalm. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Psalm 23 tells of the Shepherd, my Shepherd, who will lead me, provide for me, protect me, encourage me, and take me through the darkest valleys until that blessed day when I reach home. The Lord is my Shepherd…is He yours?

Psalm 23 – My Shepherd

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Filed under current events, Future, Preaching, scary new year, Struggles and Trials

Tagged as Good Shepherd, Psalm, Psalm 23, Shepherd

The Recovering Legalist

Thursday Thoughts (Who Knew?)

Underwear Is the Answer?

Thursday Thoughts (Cars, Stress, and Dead Actors)