Category Archives: General Observations

Just things I see that make me think.

by | May 21, 2012 · 11:12 am

Summer Reruns

Summer’s Here

Yes, according to our school calender, summer is here, and so are all the network television reruns.

For some reason, and I don’t know why, actors and other Hollywood folk have never been able to work year-round. They always take the summer months off, then start a “new season” in the fall. Why? Are we all enrolled in the same educational program? Yes. It’s called the College of Brainwashing, Indoctrination, and Cultural Manipulation (CBICM).

Sicker Stuff Coming

And speaking of cultural manipulation, have you heard about a new show that MTV tried to start, but cancelled? It was to be called “Losing It.” Literally, the folks at CBICM planned to start a new “course” in the fall that would document 18+ year-olds losing their virginity! Last year, FOX’s “Glee” celebrated straight and gay teen couples’ “First Time,” so I guess MTV had to test the depths of the gutter…

“Do you want to take things to the next level? Like, are you ready to hand over your V card? Or do you have a friend who is ready to lose it? Young adulthood is a time for exploration. New relationships, fresh experiences and sexual firsts,” read the casting notice. “Now MTV is looking to frankly capture that journey in a new series called My First. We’re looking for adults who are ready to go all the way. Let MTV come along on your journey… as you try to lose your virginity!”

Remember Twin Beds?

Do you remember when Lucy and Ricky slept in separate beds? Do you remember when no one cursed on screen? Do you remember when cartoons were full of simple violence (Bugs Bunny), instead of New Age mysticism and earth worship?

Sadly, most anything still decent to watch is old stuff in reruns (if they’re being shown at all). Every once in a while one can stumble upon an episode of The Andy Griffith Show, but now most reruns are just as bad as the new stuff. Now, instead of seeing a happy couple in separate beds, we are shown multiple couples in the same bed.

A Safe Rerun

Well, not all summer reruns have to be sick or disturbing. Some can be funny without being dirty; exciting without being violent. Some reruns even feature a monkey.

Since some of you are new to The Recovering Legalist, you may have missed early episodes of Monday Monkey. So, I hope you enjoy a couple of my favorites while the production team revamps and renews. In a few weeks Monday Monkey will be back with some new episodes worthy of the wait.

“Monkey at the Wheel” (Episode 2)

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by | May 17, 2012 · 10:35 pm

Interim Post

Stand In

You know what an “interim” is, don’t you? He is the “stand in guy” that fills the gap between somebody who’s been fired, and somebody a group of people actually want. It’s a very under-appreciated position.

Well, this is an interim post. It is a post meant to keep my readership amused and engaged while I frantically think of something more important; something worth reading; something you want.

Next Post

The next post I am going to submit is going to be a little diddy about a school named Liberty University and a Mormon named Romney. I wanted to write something the day Mitt Romney spoke at Liberty’s commencement, but I held off. I’m glad I did.

The Meantime

I the meantime, I have a question. What do you think of the look of The Recovering Legalist? Do you think it needs any changes? Should it stay the same? I am beginning to wonder.

If you are a blogger on WordPress, maybe you could suggest a new theme. Or, maybe you could suggest how to tweak this one. Either way, let me know your thoughts. I want my blog to be inviting and easy to read.

One more thing…

Do you have any suggestions for Monday Monkey? We are coming up on our 25th episode pretty soon. I still have some ideas up my sleeve, but suggestions would be welcome.

I tell you what, if I use your suggestion for an upcoming episode, I’ll send you an autographed picture (made on my laser printer, but signed with a genuine Sharpie)!

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by | May 10, 2012 · 8:20 am

Application to Date My Daughter

As a father, I totally loved this post from Jessie Jeanine. If only more parents would take dating this seriously.

Men, our daughters are gifts from God. We should be their mentors and protectors, their examples of what men should be. The last things we should be are accomplices to disrespect, abuse, pre-marital sex, heartache, regret, and the furtherance of teenage stupidity.

Print off the application in this post and USE IT! Your daughter will thank you, later…..maybe much later, but later.

Jessie Jeanine's avatarJessie Jeanine

APPLICATION
FOR
PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: THIS APPLICATION WILL BE INCOMPLETE AND REJECTED UNLESS ACCOMPANIED BY A COMPLETE FINANCIAL STATEMENT, JOB HISTORY, LINEAGE, AND CURRENT MEDICAL REPORT FROM YOUR DOCTOR.

GENERAL INFORMATION:

NAME_____________________________________
DATE OF BIRTH______________________________
HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT__________________
IQ__________ GPA__________________________
SOCIAL SECURITY #__________________________
DRIVERS LICENSE #__________________________
BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES_________________
HOME ADDRESS_____________________________
CITY/STATE___________ ZIP___________________
Do you have parents? ___Yes __No
Number of years they have been married_____________
If less than your age, explain_____________________

ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No
B. A motorcycle? __Yes __No
C. A waterbed? __Yes __No
D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No
E. Is your body a willing canvas for tattoo artists? __Yes __No
F. Do you have more piercings than my little girl? __Yes __No

(IF YOU ANSWERED ‘YES’ TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY…

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by | May 9, 2012 · 1:00 am

Needing Inspiration

Too Much

Over the last few weeks I have had so much on my plate. If you could picture a platter, one with food falling off the side and onto the floor, that’s my life. There’s just a little too much going on.

Well, it might be more of a case of poor prioritizing. When I read of some of the greats of the past, I am ashamed at how little I have accomplished in my 40+ years. Maybe my plate is too full because poorly stacked chicken salad sandwiches take up more space.

Too Much Input

Then, there is the fact that over the last few weeks I have spent hours upon hours studying for a paper I was writing. The volume of material through which I waded nearly caused my little brain to short circuit. On top of that, I preached and wrote posts for ProverbialThought.com. Too much to absorb.

On a side note, I returned 14 books to the library, today. All of them were late, and at 25 cents a day it cost me $33.50!

Where to find Inspiration?

So, with my brain fried, I knew I needed to write, but I couldn’t think of any ideas. I needed inspiration. That’s when I turned to the best place to find conversation starters – the news.

Yes, when all else fails, and you can’t think of anything worth blowing your top over, check out the news channels, the local paper, or whatever. That’s what I did! Boy, did I find a winner!

Pilot Error

I came across the story of an Air Force pilot who crashed his F-22. His plane quit providing him air to breath, so he passed out and crashed. Simple? No. The Air Force blamed him for being distracted. No joke!

Capt. Jeff Haney was flying the Air Force’s next-generation stealth F-22 Raptor on a routine training mission in Alaska in November 2010 when a sudden malfunction cut off his oxygen completely. Capt. Haney never made a distress call but took his plane into a dive and, a little over a minute later, crashed into the winter wilderness at faster than the speed of sound.

After a lengthy investigation, an Air Force Accident Investigation Board could not find the cause of the malfunction but determined “by clear and convincing evidence” that in addition to other factors, Haney was to blame for the crash because he was too distracted by his inability to breathe to fly the plane properly [emphasis added].

Can you believe that? Seriously? I would have been a little distracted too, I guess. “Hey, uh, don’t bother me with all those details, folks, I have a little problem I’m dealing with…. I CAN’T BREATH!”

That was all the inspiration I needed.

Give Me Air

This is air I breath
This is air I breathe
Your holy presence
Living in me

And I … I’m desparate for you
And I … I’m lost without you

– Mercy Me

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by | April 17, 2012 · 10:56 am

My Prize Won’t Break

The Million-Piece Trophy

Just a few minutes ago I heard the sad, sad (so sad I almost want to weep tears of sorrow – not!) news that someone accidentally broke Alabama’s national championship trophy. Sad! So sad.

Seriously, a clumsy parent (say goodbye to that scholarship) knocked over the handmade Waterford Crystal trophy (valued at $30K) and smashed it into little, tiny pieces (now they can share). Isn’t it amazing how quickly such a hard-earned symbol of accomplishment could become fodder for the dust pan.

 The Believer’s Prize

Thankfully, at the end of this race, the race of life, there awaits for the Christian something better than a football made of fancy glass. And what’s more, it won’t decay, be stolen (Matthew 6:19-20), or get broken by an overly-excited loved one.

All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. – 1Cr 9:25 NLT

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by | April 14, 2012 · 6:54 pm

Ashamed?

Sometimes I’m Ashamed

Of my past. Do you have a past? I do. We all do. And I have done many things in my past of which I am ashamed. Some things I did while I was an unbeliever, but others were after I had become a Christian. My past haunts me. Does yours?

Of course, on a positive note, one’s past can prove beneficial when rearing children. For example, my children are not totally sure if I was a secret agent, a hired gun, or a former special ops helicopter pilot who had his license taken away for excessively brutal conduct. They will never know for sure, either. The “not knowing” helps keep boyfriends away.

Of my accomplishments (or lack of). Have you ever stopped to compare yourself to others? Bad idea. There are always going to be people who can do what you do a lot better than you ever could – some before they even start elementary school.

I am a preacher, a pastor, an aspiring writer, etc. I am also 44 years old. Have you ever looked at what preachers of yesteryear were able to accomplish by my age? Don’t even start with Jonathan Edwards, Wesley, or even Billy Graham. I have been faithful, but I have little by way of accomplishments to show for it. For crying out loud, I haven’t even written one book!

Of my education. At 44 years of age I am working on my Master of Ministry degree. Guys younger than me are teaching in the seminary, for Pete’s sake! By the time I receive a doctorate, I will need full-time hospice care.

What could I have done if only I had gone to school earlier instead of working, getting married, learning about life, having beautiful children, or experiencing God’s grace? I mean, I could have been a pastor at age 20! Now that would have been shameful.

Of my lack of discipline. There are some people who wake up two hours early in order to pray. If I tried that, I’d have to be on my knees at 3 a.m.! I rarely even get to sleep until after 11 p.m.!

There are some who read at least one book a week. There are others who do all this and run, ride bikes, climb tall mountains, hunt mountain lions, and keep a spotless house. I hate them.

Seriously, I am ashamed at my lack of discipline. As a pastor, a pillar of society, I should be an example of what a disciplined person should look like. But I’m not. I struggle for every minute of sleep I can get. Sad, isn’t it?

Of my appearance. If I had the previously mentioned discipline, the kind that says, “Hey, I have a long day ahead of me, so how ’bout we go run 5 miles before breakfast,” I would be a stud. Before long I would look like a Green Beret, or Joel Osteen (with less perfect teeth). Instead, I look more like a tall Danny DeVito who has a thing for monkeys.

Yes, I can be ashamed of a lot…

But Never of the Gospel

I thank God for being able to use a weak, inadequate, undisciplined, uneducated, unattractive fool. As a matter of fact, it is only because of the gospel that I can accept my shortcomings, putting everything behind me, and look forward to what lies ahead.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek. – Romans 1:16

Only through someone who admits his shortcomings can Christ bring glory unto the Father. If I had it all together I might take all the credit, but I can’t. If there is anything good in me, it is because of Jesus (Rom 7:18; 2 Cor 3:5).

One last thing. Many times I am tempted to feel ashamed of myself. Nevertheless, even with my lack of accomplishments, etc., I know that God is not ashamed of me. And if He is not ashamed of me, then maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. I just need to keep walking and looking ahead, hoping for the day when I will be home.

But now they desire a better [country], that is, an heavenly: wherefore God is not ashamed to be called their God: for he hath prepared for them a city. – Hebrews 11:16

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by | April 3, 2012 · 11:58 pm

It’s Only a Steeple. Really?

A Steeple

If there is one bit of architecture that characterizes a Christian church, it is the steeple. Compared to the one at Woodland Park Baptist, Chattanooga, TN, ours is a fiberglass toothpick.

The first time I saw their steeple it took my breath away. A friend of mine and I were driving down the road, then all of a sudden there it was, just piercing the sky like a spear. Actually, it was sorta scary, sorta intimidating.

When my girls and I were out today, I drove them by the church to see this hazard to low-flying aircraft. They were equally impressed. Even though this portion of the church building is still under construction, the grounds are not finished, but who cares when you’re looking up?

Only a Steeple. Really?

One needs to remember, though, that a church a steeple does not make. The true Church is not even a building, but the body of Christ made up of believers in Jesus. We don’t worship steeples, or buildings, or people who build them. They are only things. The Church doesn’t need a steeple to be a church, nor does it need a steeple to point toward the risen Savior of the World. Steeples are just nice.

But as we drove away, today, I had a conspiratorial thought. What if what Woodland Park has built is not just a steeple, but something far different?

What could it be?

  • A camouflaged intercontinental missile developed in conjunction with the former George W. Bush administration?
  • A tower in which to house Bill Maher, Rachel Maddow, Chris Matthews, and all other left-wing media once Santorum is elected President?
  • A secret Holy Spirit antennae which allows Dr. Wayne Barber to receive knowledge unavailable to the common Christian?
  • A high-frequency radio signal tower that is sending out subliminal messages, making Independent Baptists join the Southern Baptist Convention?
  • A “Rapture Rocket.” In the even that the rapture skeptics are correct in their eschatology, select Woodland Park members, such as those who publish their own Bible studies, will leave Earth for the third heaven?

You just never know, do you?

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by | April 1, 2012 · 9:55 pm

Defining a Fool

April Fools Day

Today was the first time I actually preached a sermon on April Fool’s Day. Can you guess what it was about? Can you guess what I discussed?

Even though atheists think we are being smug and “snarky” by quoting Psalm 14:1, I believe the one who thinks there is no God really is a fool. But what I think matters little in the scheme of things. What matters to me is what God thinks. That is why I came up with a list.

What is a Fool?

What is a fool?  Believe it or not, Scripture lists several characteristics of a foolish person. The following is not an exhaustive list, but it’s a good start. So, why not do this Jeff Foxworthy-style?  

You might be a fool if…

  1. You are always right in your own eyes (Pr 12:15).
  2. You despise instruction (Pr 1:7; 15:5).
  3. You are unteachable (Pr 17:10; 23:9; 26:11)
  4. You’re always running your mouth, getting into trouble (Pr 29:11; 18:6-7).
  5. You are always trying to find yourself (Pr 18:2).
  6. You make fun of sin (Pr 14:9).
  7. You’re always meddling in other people’s business (Pr 20:3).
  8. You are a shame and a burden to your parents (Pr 17:25).
  9. You deny the obvious because the truth is inconvenient (Ro 1:18-22).
  10. You deny Jesus because you think the cross is foolish (1 Cor 1:18).

Don’t be a fool.

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by | March 29, 2012 · 1:27 pm

When All Else Fails

Go to the Studio

Almost every Sunday I am a part of a radio broadcast. The program goes out over am radio to at least a few thousand people each week. It can be fun, but it can also be a challenge.

Even though some things are supposed to be as simple as breathing, “stuff” happens. Today, in a crunch for time, nothing wanted to work correctly. You see, I have to record my 15 minute sermon in advance, and I usually do that at home. The problem today was that nothing would record. The mic wouldn’t work. The computer kept locking up. You name it, it happened.

That is when I got the idea to go to the radio station.

Now, I have been in multi-million dollar recording studios in Nashville. I have recorded radio spots in modern, FM stations. But this was a first for me – vintage equipment older than me (I think). It was like I had walked into a museum of broadcasting.

Amazingly, everything worked. As a matter of fact, it was far simpler to use, not mention harder to break, than the finicky software on my laptop. When all else failed, I went back to the basics – and let someone else push all the buttons.

Go to the Lord

You know, I have heard it said so many times, “When all else fails, pray.”

Why is that? Why do we wait till “all else fails?” He never fails! Why don’t we just go to God first? Why don’t we let Him push the buttons?

If I had only gone to the radio station first, things would have been a lot less stressful. I would not have yelled at my wife, kicked the dog, etc. (yes, I’m joking). But when will we understand that going to God first will not only save time and spare the dog, but it will keep us from experiencing unnecessary heartache and stress?

Mat 6:33 NKJV – “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

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by | March 24, 2012 · 1:11 pm

Atheists March While God Watches

Washington, D.C.

Today the mall in Washington, D.C. is being trampled by those who say there is no God. Below is a news article from Fox News.

Atheists and other nonbelievers are gathering Saturday on the National Mall for what organizers say may be the largest secular gathering in Washington’s history.

Thousands of atheists, humanists and others are expected to gather for the “Reason Rally,” featuring speakers, music and comedy. Organizers say they also expect to be challenged by religious groups.

The National Park Service says a permit calls for an estimated crowd of 15,000.

The American Humanist Society is one of the primary sponsors. Roy Speckhardt, the group’s executive director, says the rally will be a “coming out party” for humanists and atheists and a rally for political change.

Atheists held their first large gathering on the Mall in 2002. It was billed as “The Godless March on Washington.”

Two Points

There are just a couple of things that I would like to point out, and then I am done.

First, 15,000? Are you kidding? I am not a Joel Osteen fan by any means, but he has at least twice that many in his congregation on any given Sunday! And these people say they speak for the majority of Americans? Get real!

Secondly, I couldn’t help but think of all the monuments surrounding the National Mall. One in particular is worth noting: The Jefferson Memorial.

Atheists and humanist want to remove God from every public surface (including washing blessed roads – see below). The problem is that “God” has been deeply engraved in granite and marble for a long time. Consider the following excerpts from the panels surrounding the statue of Thomas Jefferson:

  • “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights, among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness…And for the support of this declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine providence, we mutually pledge our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor.” – Panel 1
  • “Almighty God hath created the mind free…All attempts to influence it by temporal punishments or burthens…are a departure from the plan of the Holy Author of our religion.”  – Panel 2
  • “God who gave us life gave us liberty. Can the liberties of a nation be secure when we have removed a conviction that these liberties are the gift of God? Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just, that his justice cannot sleep forever.” – Panel 3

One of key speakers at the Reason Rally will be Prof. Richard Dawkins. Speaking of this event, Dawkins says that our country is  “constantly under threat from people who would like to turn this country into some sort of a theocracy” (see story below). However, one would think that if America should have ever become a theocracy, it should have been early on, when our founding fathers were not afraid to speak of He from whom our liberties are granted.

So, while they march, while they sing, and while they laugh, God’s name surrounds them, engraved in stone, while His eye beholds their acts of reason.

_______________________________

I would encourage you to listen to all four parts of the following address by Dr. Ravi Zacharias.

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