Tag Archives: Monday

Monday Monkey Re-Run

It’s a Monday and some of you need a smile. It’s been a while since this was last posted (3 years, actually), but it’s worthy of a re-run.

One of the greatest country songs to come out of Nashville in the last, oh, 20 years was Jesus Take the Wheel.

This video is not meant to make fun of that song, so I hope Carrie Underwood doesn’t hate me when she sees this (But I hope she does see this).

This episode/edition of “Monday Monkey” pays tribute to Jesus Take the Wheel, while at the same time making fun of Monday-morning drivers. It was only the second video I’d ever made with the monkey, but it remains my favorite – I just wish it’d been longer.

“There’s a Monkey at the Wheel”

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Filed under Humor, Monday Monkey

10 Tips for Having a GREAT Monday!

Being Consistent

I am doing my best to be consistent. I’m trying to post something, however mundane or benign, every stinking day. Ever day, I tell you!

Dang the writer’s block and full steam ahead!

But to do this “every day a post” thing, you’re going to have to expect some desperate writing, even stuff that makes no sense, if not bad sense.

So, the following are 10 tips for having a great Monday, at least they sound good as I write them on a Sunday night.

10 Tips for Having a GREAT Monday!

  1. Wake up. Yeah, I know this might sound like a given, but some people have the habit of sleeping through the whole day just to avoid it. Don’t do it! Wake up! Seize it, brutha!
  2. Don’t check the news, Facebook, or Twitter till at least lunchtime. Listen, I am an information junkie, even a smartphone addict, so I understand the hankering to tap those colorful little icons – just don’t do it today (Monday). If war has broken out, you will find out through other means; you don’t need to click on Fox or CNN or Yahoo News. If you got comments and likes in the middle of the night, don’t worry – Facebook will keep them on ice for you. The only thing you need to check before 7 a.m. is blog states and anything WordPress-related.
  3. Pray before you pee. I’m serious about this, folks. If you get out of bed and go to your earthly throne room first, it won’t be long before you forget about checking in with the Heavenly Throne room. Even if you have to tell Jesus: “Lord, I want to thank you for another day to serve you and bring you glory, but I will talk with you about some other stuff just after I get through in the bathroom,” do that. I’d rather you acknowledge your creator first than forget to thank the One who gave you Monday.
  4. Eat whatever you want for breakfast. I mean, hey, it’s Monday…just eat something and get on with it. You already have enough stuff on you plate to make you dread Monday, so why not make Monday-morning breakfast something to which you look forward? Pancakes, Fruity Pebbles, donuts, cake, pie, pizza, chocolate gravy and biscuits, cookies, waffles, and pure sugar are all legitimate options. Just make sure you include coffee.
  5. Read your Bible. Look, even if you don’t want to sit down with your leather-bound KJV or your plastic-covered NIV, find some way to consume the Bread of Life before your day gets going – you’re already going to be eating enough junk.
  6. Wake up to a catchy song for your alarm. If you have a smart phone that wakes you up, and if you can set your alarm to be a song, download Gloria Estefan’s “Conga” and shake your body out of the bed. It works! seriously!
  7. Tell your spouse you love her/him before you leave the house. Believe me, it makes for a better Monday… or Tuesday… or Wednesday… etc.
  8. Plan a God hunt. What is a God hunt, you ask? Determine that even though Monday’s can be depressing, determine to look for God working in some way. Make a game of it! See if you can beat last Monday’s record.
  9. Don’t forget to brush your teeth. Bad breath will guarantee a bad day. Wishing you’d remembered to brush your teeth will aggravate you all day. So, don’t forget.
  10. Don’t dress in the dark. Yes, if you want to have a GREAT Monday, make sure your clothes match before you head out for the day. Either that, or ask your spouse how you look.

BONUS: Don’t let your wife ask you how she looks; there is no way to have a good day once that happens.

There you have it! Hope these tips help!

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Filed under General Observations, wisdom

Even Mondays Are Made By God

Today is Monday, but I guess you knew that.

Coffee always helps.

Coffee always helps.

How did you wake up? Was it with a sense of dread? Instead of turning off the alarm clock that woke you up, did you strike it like a mosquito that had been buzzing around your head for an hour?

I don’t like Mondays any more than you. As a matter of fact, Mondays are pretty rough. Mondays should be my day off, but I am (was) what they call a bivocational pastor; therefore, my alarm clock feels like a mosquito, too.

However, the Psalmist (David) says…

This [is] the day [which] the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. – Psalm 118:24 

Today…this Monday…every Monday…this is the day which the Lord has made. As a matter of fact, He has made every day. So, what will we do? Will we bemoan the blessing of waking up? Will we cry “foul” even before we enter the game? Will we start the day with the expectation that Monday will be like every other Monday?

This day was made by God. He knows what He is doing. Nothing will come our way that God is not already planning to use for our good – for those who love Him.

Today you may face a storm that leaves you feeling abandoned by God. You may feel like the disciples who were out on the Sea of Galilee all night fighting winds and waves. You may think that your Savior has forgotten you. Just remember that even in the worst storm, on the worst day, Jesus knows where you are.

When the time is right you might even get an invitation to surf the waves of adversity (Matthew 14:27).

So, rejoice! Be glad! Seize the day! It’s been custom-made for you!

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Filed under Christian Living, current events, Faith, God, Life Lessons, worship

Simply Spoiled

I just want to illustrate how spoiled we are with a simple story.

One morning not too long ago I woke up a little late and had to get ready to go to work. Because I woke up late, I didn’t have time to fix any breakfast, not even a cup of coffee. Needless to say, that made me a little irritated.

I was short with my wife, who I woke up shortly after me, because I couldn’t find her purse. I needed at least a dollar or two to buy cup of coffee that morning, because, I mean, seriously, it was going to be another two hours before I could get a cup of coffee at home. All I was asking for was a cup of coffee…not breakfast…I could eat breakfast in a couple of hours.

So, a little later there I was, sitting on the school bus, waiting for my next route, knowing it was going to be a couple of hours before having a cup coffee, or anything to eat… and I was irritated.

How do I know I was (and am) spoiled? I was acting all upset when I should have been thankful!

  • image

    A Family in Zimbabwe.

    I woke up.

  • I was able to get out of bed.
  • I woke up in a house, not a box.
  • My wife is alive and still living with me.
  • I had running water.
  • I’m fully dressed.
  • I have a job.
  • I have a bottle of clean water to drink, which is more clean water than a lot of people see in a lifetime.
  • I only had to wait two hours for a cup of coffee and some food when some people may have to wait two days…or more.
  • I’m writing all of this on a computer. I have a computer with internet, unlike millions of people. I don’t have to take a crowded bus into town just to use the internet.

So, there you have it…simply spoiled and ungrateful. God forgive me! God have mercy on us all!

 

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Filed under America, Christian Maturity, General Observations, Life Lessons

Monday Morning Prayer

Dear God,

Help me to not make You look bad today.

Amen.

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Filed under Christian Living, Christianity, Faith, Prayer, Uncategorized

It’s Fine to Say “Fine”

Slow Day

It is Monday, and I have not done much of anything. Why? Because I am completely drained of all enthusiasm, of all energy, and still sick to my stomach because of some frozen fish fillets my daughter and I made yesterday.

While many pastors take Mondays off, I still have to work (at least through this week – summer’s coming). While other pastors use Monday to play golf, read, shop for new Lear jets, or watch videos of Francis Chan and David Platt, I must get up early and drive a school bus. But does that bother me? Naaaah! The coffee and sunrises are worth it.

But today is one of those days when I want to read…I want to study…I want to get something done around the house…I want to pray…I want to – I was going to say “exercise,” but that would be lying. I want to be up and doing something, but I just don’t have the energy, and I don’t feel well. So there.

However, if somebody were to call me on the telephone and ask, “Anthony, how are your doing?“, I’d probably answer as I usually do, “I’m fine.”

Don’t Say It!

Now, I know what some of you are probably thinking; I can telepathically sense your indignation. You want to yell at me, “But you’re NOT fine, Anthony! Quit lying!” Yeah, yeah…I’ve heard that before. I’ve even preached it from the pulpit.

A while back, when I was playing bass guitar for The Glovers, the big push was to get people to be honest with each other in the church, to be honest about our hurts. For sure, some wounds can never be healed if they are never brought out into the healing light of the Truth. We would say things like, “If you were honest with your brother, you’d tell him how you really feel,” and, “You say you’re fine, buy you’re lying.”

But I want to go out on a limb and suggest something radical: sharing everything isn’t always the brightest idea.

As Frog Hair

There is a sweet lady in our church, Virginia, who responds the same way about every time I ask how she is doing. Almost without fail she will reply, “Fine as frog hair! And you can’t get much finer than that, can ya’?” Now, I know she has health problems, a few bruises from a recent accident, and a sister who is ill, but what am I supposed to say? Should I scold her for not taking the time to list all her aches and pains? Or, should I just accept the fact that she wants to be encouraging?

photo (49)Frog hair is pretty fine, I must say. But when it comes to sandpaper and steel wool, fine is certainly a relative term. For example, I would not mind someone lightly rubbing a swatch of fine, Chinese silk across my sunburned shoulder. However, if your were to take a piece of “fine” sandpaper or “OO” steal wool and do the same, I’d have to hurt you once my crying and screaming stopped. Therefore, “fine” is a relative term.

Here’s my point: the next time you ask someone how they’re doing, don’t automatically assume they are being dishonest when they say, “I’m fine.” Not everyone who has a down day writes a blog. Not everyone cares to talk about their bad fish fillets.

Sometimes it’s just fine to say, “I’m fine.”

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Filed under blogging, Christian Living, Do not judge

Simply Spoiled

I just want to illustrate how spoiled we are with a simple story.

This morning I woke up a little late and had to get ready to go to work. Because I woke up late, I didn’t have time to fix any breakfast or even a cup of coffee. That made me a little ill. 

I was short with my wife, who I woke up, because I couldn’t find her purse. I needed at least a dollar or two to buy cup of coffee this morning, because, I mean, seriously, it’s going to be another two hours before I can get a cup of coffee at home. All I was asking for was a cup of coffee, not breakfast; I can eat breakfast in a couple of hours. 

So, here I am, sitting on the school bus, waiting for my next route, knowing it’s going to be a couple of hours before I have a couple coffee or anything to eat and I’m ill.

How do I know I’m spoiled? I’m acting all upset when I should be thankful. 

  • I woke up. 
  • I was able to get out of bed. 
  • I woke up in a house, not a box. 
  • My wife is alive and still living with me. 
  • I had running water. 
  • I’m fully dressed. 
  • I have a job. 
  • I have a bottle of clean water to drink, which is more clean water than a lot of people see in a lifetime.
  • I only have to wait two hours for a cup of coffee and some food when some people may have to wait two days. 
  • I’m writing all of this on an iPhone. 

So, there you have it…I’m simply spoiled and ungrateful. God, please forgive me! 

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Filed under Christian Maturity, General Observations, Life Lessons