This episode came a little late in the day. I apologize. Just too many things to do in a day, you know?
I don’t know if pollen is a problem where you are, but it is here. So, on President’s Day, Mr. Monkey has a message for everyone to hear.
Filed under America, Humor, Uncategorized
How many advertisements have you seen for lawyers, lately? A lot? Me too! They’re everywhere!
One of my favorites went something like this:
“Have you been inconvenienced by an unfortunate misunderstanding? Do you feel like the law was written for others, while you were left uninformed? Do you need to prove you’re really not the person the news paper says you are? Call Happy, Tayka, and Moola, today! We believe YOU!”
Then, there are all the adds that try to make you think you’re dying because of some medicine you’ve taken in the last 20 years:
“Have you taken any form of medication after eating a peanut butter sandwich? Well, you’re not alone! Thousands of others, just like you, have taken medication after eating a peanut butter sandwich and have gotten ill, even died! Have you gotten ill? Do you feel like someone should pay? Call the Bludsucher Law Firm, today! You could be entitled to millions in damages! Call today!”
More than likely you know the difference between a legitimate lawyer, and one that promises you the moon. True professionals make few promises, even if they believe in your case. A good lawyer will be honest with you, never promising a guaranteed win. No attorney wins every case – except Jesus.
“My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous: And he is the propitiation for our sins: and not for ours only, but also for [the sins of] the whole world.” – 1Jo 2:1-2 KJV
Those who trust in Jesus have the greatest defense attorney in the universe. He never loses a case. And when push comes to shove; when all the evidence is stacked against us; when the Accuser says “he’s as guilty as sin,” our Advocate looks to the Judge and says, “I’ve already paid the penalty with my life.”
“Case dismissed!” And the sound of the gavel sounds eerily like a hammer hitting a nail.
Call on Jesus before the trial. He’s waiting. (Hebrews 9:27; John 3:16; Romans 10:13)
Filed under God, salvation, Uncategorized
Since I couldn’t get anyone to be my actors and actresses in Wally-Mart, I decided to just draw my video.
A few years ago I wrote this song, Try Me, for my wife, Valerie. I’ll let you figure out what parts are autobiographical, and which ones are just full of sugar.
Thanks for letting Mr. Monkey have a week off. He needed the rest.
Oh, and by the way, my song IS protected under copyright laws, even though James Brown had a song by the same title back in the 1950’s. If you would like to reproduce this song in any way, please contact me by email.
Filed under General Observations, Humor, Monday Monkey, music, Relationships and Family, Uncategorized
“How are you doing, Mr. Baker?”
What a question to ask a person lying on a hospital bed, attached to a bunch of colored wires, and aching from a harpoon in the back of his hand!
“Well, If I was doing good I wouldn’t be here, that’s for sure.”
Long story short, my wife took me to the ER because I was experiencing chest pain. The pain (a sharp, sickening feeling in my upper left chest) began to look suspiciously like a heart attack. It wasn’t, though. It’s all related to a possible ulcer, or whatever. Mostly stress.
Stress
Stress can cause a lot of problems, and pastors are subject to some of the most stress of any vocation. Bi-vocational ministers experience even more. And, because I’m lying here as the result of stress, causing my family to worry, racking up more medical bills, and wasting valuable time, I can’t help but feel guilty.
“If stress is the cause of all this,” I said to my wife, “then it makes me wonder how ‘backslidden’ I actually am?”
Now, why would I say that? Well, we’ve all been taught to “cast our burdens upon the Lord.” I’ve preached plenty of times how that “worry is a sinful” because it is “not of faith.” You see, of all people I should be an example of worry-free living. I should be able to testify to the fact that “His grace is sufficient.” But the fact is that I’m human. I do get stressed. I do worry.
Physician, Heal Thyself
It’s easy to say, “don’t worry.” It’s easy to say, “don’t get stressed.” But it’s a totally different matter when you find yourself charged with the keep of men’s souls. It is not only for myself and my family I contend, but the spiritual welfare of many, who at times, could care less.
Some have said, “Well, that’s your own fault…don’t worry about me…you live your life, and I’ll live mine.” What they don’t understand is that watching out for their lives IS my life.
For what it’s worth, if you have a pastor, keep in mind that he cares for you (or at least he should). It’s not only his job, but it’s his heart.
(NLT) Hebrews 13:17 Obey your spiritual leaders, and do what they say. Their work is to watch over your souls, and they are accountable to God. Give them reason to do this with joy and not with sorrow. That would certainly not be for your benefit.
In conclusion…I’m doing OK, but I need to keep in mind my God is in control. Other than that, thank you, Liz (my nurse) for getting me out of that “second stick.”
Filed under Christian Living, Christian Maturity, fitness, God, ministry, Preaching
I just read about another disturbing developement within the United States military. The Air Force removed “God” from the logo on one of their patches.
You see, a small group of God haters (sorry, that’s what they are) called the Military Association of Atheists and Freethinkers complained about the wording on a patch that read (in Latin) “Doing God’s Work with Other People’s Money.” You see, atheists can’t be going around doing God’s work – that would just be un…un…human, I guess.
In response to the wishes of those who care nothing for the wisdom of our Founding Fathers (see last post), Secretary of the Air Force Michael Donley approved the wording to be changed to “Doing Miracles with Other People’s Money.”
Doing Miracles?
It would seem to me that the choice of “miracle” was not just a compromise, but a statement. Coincidentally, it reminds me of another statement: “I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High.” – Isaiah 14:14
Removing “God” and replacing it with “Miracle” is not exactly making things religiously neutral. No, all it is doing is exchanging one God for another god – self. For you see, men still believe the lie first told to Eve, “YOU shall be as gods.”
When our Founding Fathers pledged to each other “our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor,” they did so with a “firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence.” What would they have to protect them today? A bunch of miracle-working atheists and freethinkers. Thank GOD they signed the Declaration of Independence when they did!
Take Action!
Please follow this link and send an email to Secretary Michael Donley insisting he restore the original wording on the RCO patch, then forward this to others.
Filed under America, Culture Wars, God
I have written a lot, even when I should have already called it quits and gone to bed. But I have erased it all. Why? Because a simple message deserves a simple post.
In the near future our country will be going to the polls to elect a president. Who we elect will say a lot about the people of this nation, for one thing remains the same: we get what we deserve.
My prayer is that a God-fearing, honorable, trust-worthy, man of character will be elected. He doesn’t have to be a Christian, but it would be nice if he bore no animosity to my faith. It was none other than George Washington who said, “Of all the dispositions and habits which lead to political prosperity, religion and morality are indispensable supports.“*
Now, more than ever, especially with recent action taken by the Obama administration, our country has taken a turn toward complete secularism. The leaders of our country seem to think that religion, especially the Christian faith, is harmful, unfair, and destructive to our society. But it was another founding father, John Adams, who said: “[W]e have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. . . . Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other.“**
But if history continues down the path it has been taking, I fear the next election will result in a further slide downward. It won’t be the president’s fault, either. It will be the fault of a people that put him in office. The reason is pretty simple: the type of president we elect is going to be a representation of the heart of the people who vote.
Righteousness exalteth a nation: but sin [is] a reproach to any people. – Proverbs 14:34
“We the people” are the thermostat. We elect a thermometer.
*(Source: George Washington, Address of George Washington, President of the United States . . . Preparatory to His Declination (Baltimore: George and Henry S. Keatinge), pp. 22-23. In his Farewell Address to the United States in 1796.)
**(Source: John Adams, The Works of John Adams, Second President of the United States, Charles Francis Adams, editor (Boston: Little, Brown, and Co. 1854), Vol. IX, p. 229, October 11, 1798.)
Filed under America, Christian Unity, General Observations, the future, voting
Even monkeys need a rest.
I am sorry, my friends, but Mr. Monkey in on vacation this week.
You may not realize this, but the innards of Mr. Monkey are attached to the body of a very busy, sleep-deprived, bi-vocational pastor who just got back from a weekend conference. After that, he preached two services on Sunday (the first one only 30 minutes after getting in from Gatinburg/Pigeon Forge, TN).
Mr. Monkey’s guts ended Sunday night with the completion of a third essay (the first two written in a hotel) and an online exam (which took 20 minutes). Seminary work is fun, fun, fun! Really, it is, honestly.
So, pass the word to all the broken-hearted. There will be no Monday Monkey this week, but there are more Mondays to come. I promise not to be like the jerks at NCIS and only show 2 new episodes the whole season!
Filed under Monday Monkey, Uncategorized
Once again I am writing a post on my iPhone 4, but this time my words are being composed in a hotel laundry room (believe it or not, there’s a funny story here, but I will save it for later).
And, if you remember, a couple of posts ago I promised to tell you about an unbiblical, heretical doctrine sweeping parts of the church. Since I have 30 minutes left on the dryer cycle, now is a good time.
The Beginning
In order to put things in perspective, we must start with the beginning. And when I say beginning, I mean THE beginning. Please consider the following verses, for they are critical:
Genesis 1:1 In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth.
John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
John 1:14 And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.
It should be obvious, according to the above verses, that not only did God create the universe, but that the Word which He spoke was none other than Jesus Christ. The doctrine that Jesus is the “express image” of God the Father, even God Himself (Hebrews 1:3), is at the core of orthodox Christianity. Jesus was not just a good man or prophet, and neither were the words of God at creation just words spoken in faith.
Did you get that last part? That’s the part I want to address.
Faith in Words
There is a teaching still being taught that essentially says, “If you have faith in your words, as God had faith when He spoke the worlds into being, you can also create a miracle, your own reality. You can be like God, if you have the faith of God.”
Excuse me? God had faith? Really? If so, in what?
First, stop and think about this! Do you realize that God is the Giver and Author of faith (Hebrews 12:1-2), not One who puts His faith in something or someone? There is something fundamentally wrong with the idea that Omnipotence would have any reason to have faith, for the very definition of faith requires a sense of dependence. When God speaks, things happen; not because of His faith, but because He’s God!
Secondly, ask yourself, “If God had faith in His Word, then would that make Him the first Christian?” How silly does that sound? But in reality, if we are to believe that God had faith in His words, which brought about creation, then would it not stand to reason, if John 1:1 is correct, that God the Father put His faith in Jesus? Was not Jesus the Word that created all things?
Then, there is the worst part…
Words of the Serpent
Do you remember how Satan tempted eve in the garden of Eden? Remember how he tried to convince her that by eating the fruit, she could “be as gods?” How similar, then, is the promise, “If you have faith in your words, as God had faith in His words, you can create like God did?”
If you think I’m making this stuff up, my friends, consider the following statements by one of the foremost teachers of this false doctrine:
“You have the same creative faith and ability on the inside of you that God used when he created the heavens and the earth.”
Kenneth Copeland, ‘Inner Image of the Covenant,’ side 2.“God used words when He created the heaven and the earth….Each time God spoke, He released His faith — the creative power to bring His words to pass.”
Kenneth Copeland, The Power of the Tongue (Fort Worth: KCP Publications, 1980), 4.
It may anger some of you, my readers, but please don’t be offended. Do as Paul told Timothy, “take heed unto thyself, and to [thy] doctrine” (1 Timothy 4:16). Please understand, to claim one has the power to create, as God created, is heresy of the highest order! Faith in our words, outside of faith in God, especially in order to bring about our will, as opposed to, or in spite of God’s will, is nothing less than witchcraft. Even more, it is the doctrine of Eden reborn: “you shall be as gods.”
Laundry is Done
Well, my laundry has been done for a while, now. Morning comes early.
I hope this post was beneficial to you in some way. But, if your were a Kenneth Copeland fan, I’m sorry. At least I didn’t mention Joel Osteen, so we can still be friends, right? Right?
Filed under Christian Maturity, cults, God, ministry, Theology, Uncategorized
It’s not my usual way to post, but this time I am making use of my iPhone app.
This evening, lying in a hotel bed, I look over and contemplate my reading material. We’re talking a LOT more than your typical Gideon Bible, aren’t we?
My wife and I are attending a ministers and wives retreat hosted by our state Baptist association. Even though we came here to be refreshed and encouraged, seminary assignments must go on.
So, if you ever wondered to yourself, “Why doesn’t this guy write more on his blog,” now you understand. The fact that I have any time at all amazes me.
But don’t interpret what I’m saying as whining! I am blessed! Many in the world would (and have) died for the privilege to study the Bible. As a pastor, as a Christian, I should not waste the opportunity I have, even if some course deadlines interfere with a little vacation time.
I don’t do this very often on the blog, but indulge me for a little bit. There is more to me than funny monkeys, you know.
Every once in a while I feel the need to do a little teaching. Keep in mind, many who read this blog do not go to a church, never hear a real pastor preach, nor even read a Bible. This might be the only path through which they choose to accept Biblical truth.
I just finished recording the audio for an upcoming radio broadcast. The text from which I preached was primarily the following:
Till I come, give attendance to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine. … Take heed unto thyself, and unto the doctrine; continue in them: for in doing this thou shalt both save thyself, and them that hear thee. – 1Ti 4:13, 16 KJV
One of the greatest challenges for the preacher is to make sure his doctrine is biblical, not based on human desires, such as the desire to only hear what we want to hear. I am reminded of the what Paul told Timothy in his second letter…
For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears; And they shall turn away [their] ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables. – 2Ti 4:3-4 KJV
How many Christians (and I use that term with caution) have literally “heaped to themselves” stacks of books, CD’s, cassette tapes, magazines, study guides, and DVD’s from televangelists, conference speakers, and popular authors who preach what scratches the itching ear? People want to hear what makes them feel good, more encouraged, and can lead to a more prosperous, fulfilled life. Few want to hear the Word of God.
The challenge, then, is for the sincere man of God to give priority to what is true doctrine, not the doctrine of men. This takes serious study, a willingness to be led by the Holy Spirit, and an understanding that what is of the Lord might not be popular.
Next time, I will address what I think is one of the most un-biblical, heretical, and outlandish lies preached by “itching-ear-scratchers.” It is a false doctrine that has captivated many Christians, but is a doctrine of devils, a doctrine which has its roots in the garden of Eden.
Can you think of what doctrine to which I am referring? Hint: It has to do with “speaking” and “faith.”
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The Recovering Legalist 