Tag Archives: love

by | February 13, 2015 · 7:00 am

Valentinerie’s Song

Yesterday was my wife’s birthday; tomorrow will be Valentine’s Day. Is it any wonder her name is Valerie? Valerie sounds a lot better than Valentinerie, though.

Valentinerie. I think I’ll go down to the maternity ward tomorrow and pass that name around.

Anyway, I wrote Valentinerie…excuse me, Valerie…a song several years ago (You can be the judge of how much was truly autobiographical). When I couldn’t figure out how to film myself doing a music video, I went to work with marker, paper, Monkey, and iPhone.

Here is the chocolate-covered fruit of my labor (I said labor…I’ve really got to get down to that maternity ward tomorrow).

“Try Me”

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! Just remember, the truest example of love is God’s love for us. May we love others with such extravagance (1 John 4:19-21).

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by | July 8, 2014 · 1:35 am

Still Awake

It’s 1:30 a.m., my wife is out of town, and this is how I feel.

“Still Awake”

The dog is asleep under his blanket

The crickets are playing their third song

The rhythmic ticking from the cheap kitchen clock

Keeps time as I muddle along

With my typing, spacing, deleting

Of words that seem right, then wrong

It’s late, but I’m doing my best to take stock

Of the reasons I’ve been awake so long.

It’s not so hard when I leave her at home

I guess I tend to focus on the task when I’m gone

But when she leaves I feel disconnectedphoto (28)

There are things to do, but I feel misdirected

I need her more than she needs me

I don’t want to go to bed, it’s hard to sleep

The hotel bed is not her spot

The bed at home is where she’s not

I don’t want to roll over and…well… fear

I just like it better when she’s here.

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by | June 18, 2014 · 6:00 am

20 Years! Take That, Devil!

We Were Young

It was a beautiful day in 1994 when my beautiful bride agreed to subject herself to a life with me. Had she known what she was getting into, she might have backed out. Of course, she would be the first to disagree with that assessment.

wedding picture oneWe were young, even though we were in our mid-twenties. It’s hard to say, however, if we had any idea how things would be once we reached our 40’s. I must say, though, that it’s funny to think back at how we thought we were starting marriage a little late. We were so young, full of energy, potential, and hope.

My wife just said, “I really thought we were old.”

The Odds Were Stacked

Most people are aware of the odds against people staying married for any real length of time. But what most people are not aware of are how dramatically the odds turn against long-term marriages when just a few factors are thrown in.

A marriage made up of two people from perfect backgrounds, with no emotional baggage, will inevitably have its struggles. But when you take two people who bring into a marriage enough emotional and spiritual baggage to fill a cattle car, well, the odds of staying married are not great. Thankfully, we serve a God who doesn’t care about the odds (Prov. 16:33).

We Started Right

I can’t tell you how many marriage proposals I have seen on YouTube! Some were so elaborate…I mean, how’s a guy to compete with a million-dollar musical?!!

Let me tell you how I did it – I took her to the altar. No, I’m not talking about going to the altar to get married; I asked her to marry me at the altar.

wedding picture fourYou see, the first time I quasi-proposed (I never really asked her to marry me) was when we both picked out her first ring – yes, her first ring. Then, later that evening, like an idiot, I took it back because “I wasn’t sure about things.”

The second time was a little different. After being told not to come back unless I brought a bigger ring, I bought a full-carat solitaire and went to church.

During a communion service, one in which it was our custom to go to the altar and pray before we partook of the elements, I asked Valerie to go with me. Once we knelt, with both of us holding hands, I officially proposed in front of God and everybody. I wanted our marriage to be something built on a holy foundation, so after she said “yes,” our first meal together was the Lord’s Supper.

Still At It

When I say we are “still at it,” you can take that any way you like. The fact is that we still struggle, still have arguments, and still act like people who never learn. But on the other hand, we still pray, still play, still love, and still worship together, and we’re still married.

20 years, and counting!

20 years, and counting!

There’s nothing wrong with people who never struggle, somehow always on perpetual honeymoon. However, any marriage worth working for, worth fighting for, will leave a few scratches on your wedding band.

My advise to others? Just keep at it.

“This is my beloved, and this is my friend” (Song of Solomon 5:16).

 

Happy anniversary, Valerie! I love you!

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by | May 24, 2014 · 1:45 pm

No Greater Love

I have noticed that a lot of folks are already posting things about Memorial Day, so I thought I would go ahead and do the same.

The following post was first published last year, but it’s worth sharing once more. I’m even going to get Katie to sing the song tomorrow at church.

First Fallen

john-michael-sullivanSeveral years ago, just after the second gulf conflict broke out, the town I was living in lost its first son. On December 30, 2006, Sgt. John Michael Sullivan was killed by a roadside bomb. Only 22, he left behind a wife and baby who was born the day after Sgt. Sullivan died.

I will never forget the visitation at the funeral home. Soldiers stood guard at each end of Sgt. Sullivan’s casket. One soldier was a West Point cadet. Every thirty minutes they would rotate out, similar to the way the guard is changed at the Tomb of the Unknown in Arlington. The honor and respect was palpable.

“Not Here”

Folks in the southern United States don’t take kindly to disrespect – especially at the funeral of a fallen soldier. Sgt. Sullivan died while taking a friend’s place on patrol, which made him a genuine hero. He was a local boy. So, when it was rumored that protesters from Westboro Baptist Church were going to be protesting, blood began to boil.

patriot guardStanding guard outside the funeral home, standing shoulder-to-shoulder, were motorcyclists (over 200 hundred of them) holding American flags. They lined the street and sidewalks as far as anyone could see. Each one, wearing leather vests,  seemed as tough as the Harleys they rode.

I won’t give names, but I heard a couple of high-ranking officials discussing the protesters. They knew Westboro’s hateful tactics and what typically went on at other funerals. So, in a whisper not meant to be overheard, one official said to another, “If those ———-‘s show up, just turn your back – let the guys outside handle them.”

Westboro never showed up. They must have gotten word.

More than Talk

Some people talk a big talk, but never walk the walk. Some people brag about what they would do in a given situation, such as combat, but never volunteer to prove it. But as Sgt. Sullivan lay there in his casket, no words were needed; his sacrifice proved his courage – and love.

Sgt. SullivanScripture says, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). Others may say they love their friends, but the silent soldier in front of me didn’t have to say a word.

As I paid my respects, it struck me how this young man had essentially given his life for me, a stranger. Like so many other men and women we remember on Memorial Day, Sgt. Sullivan willingly took another’s place. He did what we could not.

The emotion I felt that day led me to write a song in Sgt. Sullivan’s honor. But it also honors of the One who gave His life so that we could be eternally free.

Here is “No Greater Love” as sung by my daughter, Katie (we just recorded it on the iPhone, so forgive the low quality).

(Note: Unfortunately, when I wrote the song, I didn’t know Sgt. Sullivan was actually 22. However, his mother, after hearing the song, told me it was OK.).

Links

http://www.fallenheroesproject.org/united-states/john-michael-sullivan/
http://freedomremembered.com/index.php/sergeant-john-michael-sullivan/
http://www.stripes.com/news/unit-remembers-dedicated-soldier-who-was-killed-just-before-his-son-s-birth-1.58888

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by | February 12, 2014 · 1:40 am

Happy Birthday, Valerie!

Before I say anything else…

Before I post another, well, post…

Before I write about things that matter little to me in the big scheme of things…

Before another minute of this beautiful (and seriously rainy) day is wasted…let me say,

valerie“Happy Birthday!” to my lovely wife, Valerie (named after Valentines Day). She is the sugar that makes my life sweet.

She is my sunshine on a cloudy day.

She is my anchor when I start to drift.

She is the unflinching lover when I don’t even love myself.

She’s cement that holds this family together.

She’s the warrior that fights on her knees.

She’s the one who regularly reminds me that there is One who has everything in control, even when I want to throw in the towel.

She’s the one who never gives up, always tries one more time, and considers “it all joy.”

I’ve not given her the life she really deserves, but I know one day God will reward her for all she sacrificed for me.

Happy birthday, Valerie! I love you!

Once again I’m gonna share this video with a song I wrote several years ago just for her. I hope you enjoy it.

But please! Somebody pass this song on to a country star so I can make enough money to buy her something nice for our 25th anniversary…

…seriously, I’m a starving song writer (BMI), so hook me up.

Happy Birthday, Valerie! I love you!

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by | February 11, 2014 · 7:41 pm

Love Somebody – Be Somebody

Valentine Banquet

On Sunday afternoon, just after church, our youth staged a spectacular Valentine’s Day banquet in our gym. It was essentially a fundraiser for an upcoming trip to Ridgecrest (North Carolina). All the youth worked as servers.

The program featured a meal, complete with dessert, live entertainment, and our twist on an old television game show; it was called The Oldywed Game.

The Oldywed Game

The Oldywed Game

Here is a picture of the game in progress. Three couples from our church graciously accepted the offer to ruthlessly compete against each other, all for the satisfaction of winning a box of chocolates. The losers got three free appointments for marriage counselling.

Thankfully, the banquet/fundraiser was a huge success. However, for me the highlight was hosting the Oldywed game (oh, and I made the set they sat behind…yes, I’m talented). My comedic talents were brilliantly put to use, of course.

Old Standards

Now, there were a lot of people who worked feverishly to put the banquet together, but my youngest, Haley, must have stressed for months over the music selection. You see, she wanted to have standards from Bing Crosby, Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra, and others playing in the background. It took her a while, but she found more than enough, and all of it sounded great.

One song caught my attention. Dean Martin sang, “You’re nobody till somebody loves you, so find you somebody to love.” That’s when my mind flashed back to 1 Corinthians 13 (the love chapter).

“And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.” – 1 Corinthians 13:2 NKJV

Be Somebody

I don’t know if the songwriter knew of 1 Corinthians 13:2, but he hit on a profound truth: without love, we are nothing. As the apostle Paul made perfectly clear in this chapter, it doesn’t matter how much you know, how much you give, how spiritual you think you are, or how talented you may be; if you don’t have love for others, it’s all worthless – you’re a nobody.

There is an age-old truth most wise people know: if you want to be loved, show love. But it’s not just any ol’ love, you understand.  As Christians, we are to love for Jesus’ sake, without expectation, just like He loved us. Because of His love, we love Him (1 John 4:19).

So, if you want to really be “somebody,” it would seem you need to love others. If you’re “nobody till somebody loves you,” then go find somebody to love. The world’s full of people in need of just that.

Makes sense to me. How ’bout you?

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by | August 15, 2013 · 9:31 pm

“This is all for you.”

The Video

I had never heard of Mobbed, but then my daughters showed me the video I am going to share with you. They said, “This is the best video EVER!”

I sat down with my dinner in front of my computer and started watching. It wasn’t long before I was crying. My daughters and wife were snickering and pointing at me (which is typical), but they had no idea why I was really crying.

Please, watch this video. It is truly a wonderful thing to behold, and you may tear up, too. But after you watch it, please read what I have written below.

Reasons for Tears

As I was watching this video with my wife and girls standing behind me, my initial thought was, “My gosh! I wonder how much that cost?…Oh great! What am I going to do for our 20th anniversary in just 10 months?!”

Then, as the bride-to-be was walking down the make-shift isle, the groom-to-be said (10:00), “This is all for you.”

I literally wept. Oh wow!

My memory immediately recalled Hosea 11:4, “I drew them with the cords of a man, with bands of love…” Then I remembered the message of other passages…

“Hereby perceive we the love [of God], because he laid down his life for us…” 1 John 3:16a

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”  John 3:16

“But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” – Romans 5:8

Stop and think about it!

We are the Bride, and God has done it all. He has paid the highest price; surrounded us with a “cloud of witnesses;” guided us when we didn’t know where to go; and surrounded us with beauty and surprises at ever turn. All of it was planned long before we knew what was going on, and He did it all…all for a “yes.”

One of my daughters said, “Wouldn’t it have been horrible if she had said ‘no’?”

Yes, it would have been. But just think of how many do it every day? How horrible! How sad for Him!

If nothing else, this video made me love Jesus even more.

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by | November 11, 2012 · 10:12 am

Family Resemblance

Wedding Update

Not long ago I wrote about how I hated weddings. Well, I might need to update that a little. If all weddings could be like the one I just officiated, I might be a little more excited.

Yesterday (11-10-12) I had the honor to unite Alicia, my step-daughter, and Josh Westbrook in marriage. It was a fun, sweet, and beautiful ceremony which brought both laughter and tears. At one point, unlike most any other time, I was almost sad it was over (and then I remembered how much cleanup had to be done).

One moment that I will always remember was my opening statement…”Wuv, Twue Wuv…” Yes, I actually said it.

Proud Father

Even though a professional photographer was taking pictures, I got Katie to take a picture of just Alicia and me. I wanted to be able to remember standing next to such a beautiful bride.

Of course, all dads think their daughters are beautiful, right? This is no exception. However, I can truly say she got her looks from her mother, not me. If you see any resemblance between us, then it is only coincidental, because remember, she’s my step-daughter.

But even though Alicia may not have gotten any of her physical characteristics from me, there were some other characteristics she did inherit, and they were made known through her vows to Josh.

The Vows

Instead of doing it the old-fashioned, traditional way, Alicia and Josh wrote their own vows (which made it easier on me). Josh actually said his by memory (or made them up as he went along, I don’t know), but Alicia had to read hers. She gave them to me to hold until her turn.

After Josh recited his vows, Alicia looked at me, which was my cue to give her the vows she had printed on piece of paper. Then, as she read those words, halted slightly by her tears, her relation to me became evident. The family resemblance was obvious. See if you can pick up on it.

I, Alicia, take you Josh, my best friend, to be my husband.

I give you this ring, my heart, and every part of me.

With it I vow to always: love, honor, respect, and cherish you forever.

I promise to always be open and honest, be there in good times and bad, and to be forever faithful.

I promise to always live first for our God and then for you as your helpmate as it is commanded in His Word.

I promise to always be your partner, your best friend, and your number one fan.

I promise to always listen to the words you speak, and listen even harder for the ones that you don’t.

I promise to embrace whatever changes life throws at us as it will only make us grow closer together.

I promise to always laugh with you, give you back scratches every night and to always give you those “madly in love kisses” no matter how old we are.

I promise all of this to you in front of God and these witnesses until death do us part because we WILL NOT FAIL!

The Promise

A lot of promises are made at weddings. Many times those promises are broken, leaving hearts and lives in ruin. But marriages in which the couple puts God first, then loves each other with the sacrificial love He modeled in Christ, are far more likely to see those promises kept.

And when it comes to promises, I am thankful for this one: “Train up a child in the way [she] should go: and when [she] is old, [she] will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6).

I am very proud of you, Alicia.

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by | March 18, 2012 · 11:54 pm

He Finished Well

Yesterday, which was Sunday, I preached a sermon entitled “Finish Well.” In honor of those men and women who peacefully risk their lives, running the race, sharing the love of God, I want to pay tribute to one who paid the highest price.

Tonight I read the following story: click here to read it. I have a wife and two young daughters, also. I can’t imagine their pain.

In memory of Joel Shrum, a 29-year-old English language teacher from Harrisburg, Pa., there will be no Monday Monkey. Please remember his family in your prayers.

He finished well.

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by | February 13, 2012 · 2:22 am

Monday Monkey “Valentine’s Day Song” (Episode 15)

Since I couldn’t get anyone to be my actors and actresses in Wally-Mart, I decided to just draw my video.

A few years ago I wrote this song, Try Me, for my wife, Valerie. I’ll let you figure out what parts are autobiographical, and which ones are just full of sugar.

Thanks for letting Mr. Monkey have a week off. He needed the rest.

“Try Me”

Oh, and by the way, my song IS protected under copyright laws, even though James Brown had a song by the same title back in the 1950’s.  If you would like to reproduce this song in any way, please contact me by email.

 

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