Category Archives: self-worth

by Anthony Baker | October 15, 2024 · 9:33 am

Tending Another’s Sheep or Put On a Shelf? Which Is It?

You are now reading what I’m thinking. I am writing as the thoughts percolate and bubble out of my brain. Thankfully my iPhone is water resistant!

Yes, I’m writing what you are reading on my old, cracked up iPhone 12 Pro Max while standing in a dimly-lit break room in the Volkswagen plant in Chattanooga, TN. It’s a little chilly in here, too, especially when I’m not doing anything but standing.

An Update

You’re probably curious, so let me give you a thumbnail sketch of my reality. I used to be in full-time ministry, but now I’m working in the VW plant making Atlas SUVs. I’ve been here about a year and a half, during which time my neck started hurting. For the last 2 months I’ve been on restricted duty – in the break room.

To look at this another way, not only am I not doing what I love most (preaching), I’m not even doing what I’m supposed to be getting paid for. I am literally waiting for decisions from up above – the people in worker’s comp insurance.

Two Scenarios

It all reminds me of two possible scenarios. One is that of a prophet stuck out in the backside of the wilderness tending his father-in-law’s sheep. The other is that of a worthless, unusable vessel or tool put up on a shelf. I’ve often wondered which one is me.

Am I a Moses or a cracked pot? Maybe I’m both.

Forgive me for making this all about me, myself, and I. It is, after all, my story. However, the truth that I’m about to share is applicable to you just as much as me. Who knows, our stories may not be all that different.

Here is the great truth. Here is the fact that could change your life. Are you ready for it?

Listen carefully …..

There is no shelf.

You read that right. There is no shelf. There is no place where God places a useless vessel, and why is that? Because no one is useless. All of us are still capable of bringing glory and praise to our Maker. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be here.

Oh, I’ve heard it preached. I’ve even preached it. You may have heard it said that God takes those who’ve messed up and puts them “on a shelf” to sit. They sit there, gathering dust, accomplishing nothing, especially nothing like the purpose for which they were designed.

But, like I said, there is no shelf.

Read Philippians 1:6; Romans 8:28-30; Ephesians 4:8-10; and Psalm 138:8. In these passages we read nothing about uselessness. What we do see is that God has a plan, we are a part of it, and He will accomplish the work He started in us for His glory!

So, that leaves us with the other option. Are you and I stuck in a place we never thought we’d be, doing work we were never trained for? Does it feel like we are no longer of any use to God, so He has relegated us to taking care of other people’s stuff?

Moses must have felt that way, but God had greater things ahead for him and the time tending Jethro’s sheep was simply preparation.

Testimony Destroyed?

Someone once told me, “I destroyed my testimony.” But honestly, if the Lord is always faithful, even when we are not (2 Timothy 2:13), how can we “destroy” a testimony? Sure, you may do something that might disqualify you for a particular work, such as being a pastor, but every breath you breath is a testimony to the faithful love, mercy, and grace of your Father!

Where you and I are may not be where we wanted to be, or even where we could have been, especially if we had made better decisions. But God is sovereign! We may roll the dice, but the Lord determines how it lands (Proverbs 16:33).

I am confident that I’ve not been set aside by Jesus, never again to use the gifts He has given me. “The gifts and callings of God are without repentance” (Romans 11:29).

I’m just in the break room waiting on word from higher up.

4 Comments

Filed under Life Lessons, self-worth

Tagged as Christianity, Ministry, Moses, purpose

by Anthony Baker | June 1, 2023 · 8:38 pm

My Mid-Life Crisis

How are you? How are you doing? What’s up?

How do you respond when people check up on you? Do you respond differently to different people? Do you give different answers, some more transparent than others, depending on whom you can trust?

Well, I trust you. Yes, I do. For one reason, you are actually reading this when so many others couldn’t care less. You care enough to get past the introduction.

So, how am I doing? Not well.

I think it was my wife (I can’t remember) who asked me the other day, “Are you having a mid-life crisis?” “Maybe I am,” I replied. I haven’t researched it, so I don’t know. However, I would bet that a definition would include a picture of someone that looks eerily like me.

For one thing, five decades worth of mistakes, miscalculations, stupid decisions, and squandered opportunities continually plague my memories. It’s not that I sit around and meditate on my past until I think of something depressing; they are triggered by ordinary things like a store at the mall, a movie, a song, a smell, an event, an expression, etc. I can drive down one road and be hit with 10 regrets in the span of a mile.

Secondly, there’s all the things I could have done and should have done. Have I accomplished anything? Of course. But when I am in a group of others who’ve accomplished anything similar, I feel like a fake, an imposter. I should be able to fit in, but now I never feel worthy.

I’m not a spiritual giant or anything. I’m not that great of a speaker. I have a very hard time praying. And, based on my cumulative experience, I’m a lousy pastor. Yet, that is all I’ve ever really wanted to be. I wanted to be “man of the Book,” a man with worn knees, a figure behind the pulpit my children would tell their children about.

But here I am, pushing 56 years old, a new employee in an automotive factory, with no savings, no home, a literal antique car to drive, and no real desire to pastor another church.

Simply put, I don’t know who I am anymore. For that matter, I’m not sure I ever did.

I don’t know where life is going to find me 5 or 10 years from now. However, even though I may never be a leader of anything, I can strive to be a good follower of Jesus.

3 Comments

Filed under Christian Maturity, Depression, old age, maturity, self-worth

Tagged as adulting, aging, faith, mid-life, Religion

by Anthony Baker | January 29, 2023 · 10:21 pm

The Benefit of Darkness

Some people will insist that a Christian should never go through a dark time in his life. The idea is that “joy unspeakable” should empower a perpetual smile even in the middle of imminent doom.

What’s more, it’s the people in the Church who most often criticize the discouraged and depressed, treating them like whatever is bothering them could not be bad enough to challenge their faith, that is, if their faith was genuine.

It doesn’t help, either, when the rest of the world’s problems are weighed in the balance with ours. It’s like, “There are people being burned alive for their faith and you’re having a spiritual identity crisis?” It’s no different than saying, “If you think YOUR pain is bad, you should feel MINE.”

There’s songs and sermons galore about persevering through the storms of life and coming out stronger on the other side. There’s even much talk about joy in the midst of sorrow, about peace in the midst of spiritual attack. But what I don’t think I’ve ever heard is a recognition of the value or benefits of the “dark” times we may experience.

When I say I’m in “a dark place,” what does that mean? For different people it can mean different things, of course, but what do you typically think about? What do you associate with dark places?

I’ll tell you what I’ve seen in the dark places: anger, regret, sorrow, resentment, bitterness, resignation, self-doubt, self-hate, weariness, loneliness, helplessness, worthlessness, and a “deaf heaven” and “bootless cries” (to borrow from Shakespeare). It’s probably not necessary to tell you of the thoughts that accompany such darkness.

So how could there be any benefit to such darkness, such despair? How could there be any value to such moments? Well, I’ve wondered that, myself. Yet is our God not sovereign? If truly redeemed, am I ever out of His hand?

There exist rare and refined elements which offer solutions to problems yet to be discovered. In other words, there are things that, until they were discovered, we didn’t even know we had a need for them. Sometimes these things are discovered in the remains of previous failures.

I have come to believe that the strongest faith is produced in the dark, when all appears lost, when all efforts have failed, and when there’s nothing solid left on which to stand. Faith is then the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen.

The strongest faith can only be found, not in just weakness, but when there’s no strength at all.

When I’ve messed up so much and so many times that I’ve not even a single seed to plant in a dry field with no rain in sight, faith is the evidence of the crop to come.

The benefit of darkness is the failure of myself and the hope of Him who will not let me go.

1 Comment

Filed under Depression, Faith, self-worth, Struggles and Trials

Tagged as Christianity, darkness, depression, faith, guilt, self-worth

by Anthony Baker | November 16, 2022 · 8:03 am

Would Someone Help Me Understand?

Lately something has been on my mind. It’s not something that’s openly in the news or often talked about, yet it’s everywhere you look, if you’re looking.

Please don’t get offended or triggered by what I’m about to ask, just help me with it. Call me ignorant, if you’d like, but ignorance is only a lack of information or understanding, and there is nothing wrong with that – unless it’s willful.

Here’s the question:

Why is transitioning to look like the stereotypical appearance of the gender to which you’re transitioning not an affirmation of the very stereotypes with which you disagree?

You see, I’ve been around long enough to remember life before yesterday, even before Obama. In a not-too-distant past Barbie was condemned for her looks because she seemed to exhibit what culture deemed “feminine.”

I can remember when the supposed male-dominated culture’s idea of female looks included long hair, makeup, dresses, high heels, extended lashes, bras, silk stockings, and a certain sway of the hips when walking. If all done right and in the correct proportions, a man could look at that package and say, “Man! What a woman!”

Oh, but then came the biker chicks, the tomboys, and all the “butch” females who railed against the stereotype. Looking “female” was about being whatever you felt and not limited to what culture expected. Girls didn’t have to wear dresses and makeup; they could have short hair, wear wife-beater shirts, and still prefer the opposite sex.

Yet, what do we see today? Biological males who claim to female that can only be satisfied if they change their appearance into the epitome of the stereotype to which actual women of the past rebelled!

Why can’t a man who wants to be a woman still be a woman yet look like a man? Why can’t a woman who wants to be a man retain her feminine appearance while assuming all the roles of the male of the species? Why does transitioning necessitate the changing of appearance when appearance is only supposed to be skin deep?

Seriously, help me understand, because I really don’t get it.

3 Comments

Filed under Culture Wars, General Observations, self-worth

Tagged as female, male, questions, Sexuality, transgender, transitioning

by Anthony Baker | June 23, 2022 · 1:58 pm

Is It Really a Matter of Gun Accessibility?

President Joe Biden said today that he was “deeply disappointed” in the Supreme Court’s ruling in New York State Rifle & Pistol Association v. Bruen. The ruling struck down New York citizens from having to provide proof of need to have a concealed carry permit. As usual, he believes that this will only lead to more gun violence and death.

Biden believes that there should be less accessibility to firearms, not more. He is calling for all “Americans across the country to make their voices heard on gun safety. Lives are on the line.” Gov. Kathy Hochul (D) of New York is said to have stated that the 2nd Amendment was written when all we Americans had were muskets, and that she is prepared to go back to muskets.

But is the accessibility to and the availability of firearms in America the reason for recent violence? Will stopping a New Yorker from carrying a 9mm pistol under his stop the next teen in black from illegally obtaining an AR-15? Will changing laws that allow law-abiding citizens to carry legally obtained weapons convince the average criminal to lay down his? Of course not.

I would say that it’s not the availability and accessibility that’s the problem; it’s what’s causing people to use them in ways they never did 40 years ago.

If you were to remove all the guns from America overnight, you would still have people who are bent on killing as many others as possible. And when they do, they will become stars overnight.

As I was thinking about this today, I began thinking back to the 90’s when all this really started. What caused that shooting at Columbine? What have been the common denominators between nearly all mass shooters? Was it simply the fact that they were able to get their hands on a weapon?

What I see as common factors are depression, isolation, feelings of futility, low self-worth, bitterness and hate toward the innocent. Where is all this coming from? Are guns making people this way?

No. But when you remove intrinsic and objective reality and truth from souls in search of meaning, acceptance, and genuine love, what you get is a dark, hateful void where honor, duty, responsibility, and love used to be.

When America was a nation with a collective vision and understanding of right and wrong based on moral absolutes, mass shootings were unthinkable. But now we are rearing generation after generation without offering objective truth while also promoting a technological culture in which the individual becomes the center of his own universe. In this universe, the other people are only in the way.

2 Comments

Filed under America, self-worth

Tagged as gun laws, Guns, Joe Biden, Supreme Court

by Anthony Baker | March 8, 2021 · 11:46 am

When Less is More (becoming less white)

When it Bubbles it Foams

Who doesn’t love a good, cold Coca-Cola (or as we say down here in the South – where it was invented – Coke), especially on a hot day beside the pool, after some yard work, or a good workout at the gym? Wow, not that many hands, I see. Hmm.

OK, I get it, Coke is a fun addition to a meal, especially in a big foam cup from a Sonic Drive-In, but it’s not the most thirst-quenching beverage, nor the most healthy. Yet, it’s a multi-billion-dollar powerhouse. And when it comes to their brand image, I’m sure heads could roll if some petty little inconsequential white employee was allowed to make a fool of the execs in Atlanta.

So, when a story began to bubble up about employee training that included a slide presentation suggesting we all be “less white,” the media and the company began to foam, and for different reasons entirely.

You Want Me to be LESS White?

Now, when I Googled the story about the training in question, the first thing that popped up was a Snope’s article decrying the “opponents of critical race theory and diversity training” claiming they had “no real evidence.” Typical.

However, the non-evidence produced by Karlyn Borysenko (or as Snopes describes her, “a prominent online opponent of critical race theory and many aspects of corporate diversity training“), that of a leaked photo of the slides, clearly confirms what she has reported. And what is that, exactly?

We should all try be be “less white.”

If Less, then More

I am going to skip ahead and pass over the opportunity to discuss the reasons why every person of less pigment should be grossly offended by the obvious inferences. Yes, I am going to choose to tone back the offended victim feelings and look at this from a different perspective.

I’m not that great in math, but let me propose an analogy. Let’s just say we have 100 dollars in hand (which would be nice, wouldn’t it?). How much money would you have in your hand if I reached out and took 99? You’d only have $1 in hand, correct?

Now, what if I had $100 in my hand and kindly, graciously, and typical of WAPs (White Anglo-Saxon Protestant) gave your friend Scratchy $10 when he asked for money to get gas to see his dying grandmother? I would have “less” than $100, wouldn’t I? I would only have $90, but it would be far more than your pitiful, lonely dollar bill, correct?

Both of us would have less, but my “less” would be more than your “less” by far.

Considering the inferences are legit, and if I’m not any of the the negative stereotypes suggested in the leaked slides, then I need to have some of those qualities in order to have LESS of them.

Creating a Monster!

So, I need to be “less” than what I’m not. Therefore, I need to become a total monster of a jerk (I’m avoiding using other descriptors for the sake of propriety) in order to find room to lessen my “whiteness.”

First, I need to become oppressive. How do I do that? Slavery has been outlawed, so I don’t have anyone to beat with a whip (I need to get a whip). I don’t have enough money nor manpower to take over anyone else’s property, so I don’t know how I can force them to dig up the gold in their back yard. I’ll have to think about this one.

Second, I need to become supremely arrogant. OK, that I can do. I mean, I am smarter than those who don’t look like me. The only reason I’m not a wonderful, godly scientist like George Washington Carver; a legal brain like Justice Clarence Thomas; a political genius like Dr. Thomas Sowell; or a musician like B. B. King, is because I have all my servants do my work and study for me. I guess I could do more for myself.

Third, I need to become certain that everything I do and believe is right. I need to be absolutely certain that my way of worship is better than others’. I need to be really confident in all my decisions regarding finances, marriage, family, ministry, etc. That way all I will need to do in order to qualify as “less white” is doubt myself every once in a while.

Next, I need to become defensive and get offended at every time someone accuses me of something just because of the color (or lack thereof) of my skin. Then, who knows? Maybe I’ll write a humorous and slightly sarcastic article, yell at the dog for looking at me funny, or join up with some group who wears black, lifts their fists, and wants to be paid for their great great great great grandfather’s troubles. Then all I’ll have to do is tune it down a little and be loved by all!

The fiph ting I need tuh do is come more da ignorunt. Penceforth i’d b’n upin my noledge wid edumacation. Buh now I gotta go in da re … re … reversssss … reversal, yeah, that’s it! and become stoopid sow I kan be less stupider. Oh, wait, were they simply suggesting that I become more informed? Well, duh, wen u ignorant ju eggspect?

The last two things, well, that’s a different story. I don’t have to become more prideful to become more humble; I’m always too prideful, and that has nothing to do with whether I’m white or not. It’s always a struggle to be humble in all things. Unfortunately, God has a way of breaking down our pride.

And when it comes to listening, if I hadn’t been listening, I wouldn’t be writing this, today. If I had not been listening, I would not have become indignant with the insinuations that people of my color are horrible people by nature. If I had NOT been listening, I would have never noticed how a training like the one at Coca-Cola is as racist as anything from the KKK.

I tell you what, how about we all pass on the Coke, drink Perrier, and continue to treat people based on the “content of their heart, not the color of their skin”?

Nothing less.

1 Comment

Filed under Culture Wars, current events, General Observations, politics, self-worth

Tagged as Coke, diversity training, Less White, Racism

by Anthony Baker | July 30, 2020 · 7:28 am

You Might Be a Sinner If…

(L-R) My paternal great grandfather and grandfather.

I’m a Redneck

Yes, I confess. I am a redneck, especially considering how burned my neck is after standing out in the sun for five+ hours. Which leads me to ask a question of myself…why do I never remember sun screen unless I go to a beach?

And I also know that I am a redneck because Jeff Foxworthy told me so. If you remember, Foxworthy’s comic routine made famous the line, “You might be a redneck.” Here are some that I know have applied to me at least once over the 50-plus years of my life.

You might be a redneck if…

You read the Auto Trader with a highlight pen.
Every socket in your house breaks a fire code.
The taillight covers of your car are made of red tape.
Directions to your house include “Turn off the paved road.”
Going to the bathroom at night involves shoes and a flashlight.
You use the term `over yonder’ more than once a month.

I’m a Sinner

Unlike a whole lot of people in this world (and in a world of their own), I can admit that I am a sinner. The only difference is that once I confessed my inability to change my nature, I traded my “filthy rags” for the imputed righteousness of Jesus Christ (Philippians 3:9). Now, I’m still a sinner, but I’m am a saved sinner.

So, based on the actions of Adam and Eve in the third chapter of Genesis, I took a cue from Jeff Foxworthy and came up with my own list of “you might be’s.” From that list I preached a message entitled “You Might Be a Sinner If…”

You might be a sinner if…

You have ever talked to a Serpent – and taken its advice (v. 2).
You know the difference between “Naked” and “Necked” (v. 7). Side Note: If you consider fig leaves appropriate attire, you might be a sinner.
You feel like running when the law shows up (v. 8).
God is searching for you, and not the other way around (v. 9).
You feel self-conscious or defensive about anything you’ve ever done (v. 9-10).
You ever play the “blame game” – Others, “The devil made me do it” (v. 11-13).
You were born (Romans 5:12).

Change of Status

Some people try on their own to change their status in life. Sometimes rednecks move away from Redneckville in order to become a different person. But what they find out is that Redneckville never left their heart. They still have those same desires to grill Spam and fish with dynamite.

In the same way, many people think, once they finally realize they are sinners, that change can come with a simple change of atmosphere, or the turning over of a new fig leaf.

The fact is that sinners don’t become “saints” on their own. It takes outside intervention.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. – 1 John 1:9

Let’s Talk About Moses and Righteousness

Been Busy

Someone whom you may know as Angel made a keen observation: I haven’t been posting much, lately.

Well, there is a reason why that observation is correct… It’s no more complicated than the fact that I’ve been busy, busy, busy.

And when I’m not busy, I’m usually just too dang tired to get my brain into writing gear. But I’m sure it’s just a phase.

Been Preaching and Teaching

But one thing that hasn’t slacked off is the time I have spent in front of an iPhone camera. Literally, the only time I am not recording and uploading preaching or teaching content is on Saturday. But it’s twice on Sunday, so…

Therefore, even though I’ve not been doing a lot of writing, I have been speaking. And that’s OK! I love it! So, when you have the time, I would encourage you to check out the following two videos. They are the latest that I have edited and uploaded to YouTube (and that’s work, too).

Oh, and I’ve been walking every day and doing my best to lose weight, especially for my daughter Katie’s wedding in October.

Love you guys!

2 Comments

Filed under Bethlehem Baptist Church, Christianity, Church, ministry, Preaching, self-worth

Tagged as Church, heaven, hell, Jesus, Moses, Old Testament, Religion, salvation, video, YouTube

by Anthony Baker | May 26, 2020 · 3:52 pm

Are You a Cracked Vase?

Have you ever had one of those times when you felt the Holy Spirit was at work, using you in a special, sorta like He’s-in-control-not-me kind of way?

Today was one of those days.

Every day at around 2pm I do a live, short devotional for our church members. That’s what the following video is, only uploaded to the church YouTube channel.

Have you ever felt that God can no longer use you? Have you ever felt like your best days of ministry are behind you? Are you a cracked vase?

This message is for you!

2 Comments

Filed under Bethlehem Baptist Church, Christianity, Church, ministry, self-worth

Tagged as Bethlehem Baptist Church, devotional commentary, pottery, self-worth, vases

by Anthony Baker | February 28, 2020 · 9:10 am

A Doctrinally-Worthless Bumper Sticker

I’m facing a pretty busy weekend, so instead of writing something new for today, here’s an observation and commentary, more like an open letter to my readers, that I wrote back in 2018. It’s an example of what can wake me up when I’m tired: stupidity and shallow doctrine. Enjoy!

Happy Friday, everybody! 🙂

Dear blogger friends,

Have you ever had so much to write, but being sleepy, tired, worn out and ready for bed kept you from it?

Have you ever wanted to launch into the deep waters of controversial topics only to realize the sails of your little boat were too tattered to catch the wind?

Well, that’s about how I feel right now. I’m tired, sleepy, and I need to get up early in the morning.

However, I saw a bumper sticker today that really got my goat, so I have to say something.

You see, just tonight I was going through a small book that was given to me by a Muslim “apologist,” and my head is still spinning from all the twisted scripture he used to “prove” his obscenely ignorant arguments. The former Baptist converted to Islam, then he wrote a book meant to “prove” that Jesus never claimed to be God nor died on the cross.

If there was one verse taken out of context, there were ten. If there were ten times he made ignorant inferences, there were a hundred where he proved nothing more than that he never studied the Bible as a Baptist, much less as a Muslim.

Maybe, just maybe, if this man had spent more time in the Word of God studying what it actually said instead of being caught up in some social or racial “gospel,” he might have never fallen victim to the foolishness he now believes.

And that’s where the above bumper sticker comes in… It’s about the most useless attempt at profundity I’ve ever seen; it makes no sense whatsoever.

You may think that “Jesus [loves] Feminists” is a wonderful truth, but let’s take a moment or two to unpack it.

First of all, Jesus loves feminists. Yes, He does.

However, Jesus also loves prostitutes and murderers, so what’s the point?

Jesus loves sinners, and that’s why He went to an old, rugged cross to suffer and die for the sins of the world. “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life” (John 3:16).

Are feminists sinners? Is that what they’re saying?

Or, is the bumper sticker implying that Jesus loves feminists, but not chauvinists? Is it saying that Jesus prefers tree-hugging egalitarians over traditionally conservative complementarians? Does Jesus love some people and not others? Is that the point?

On the other hand, maybe it’s simply trying to say that Jesus loves feminists, also. Like, Jesus loves the chauvinists, the complementarians, the macho men, AND the feminists.

If that’s the case, then Jesus loves everybody, right? So what’s the point of the bumper sticker?

Unfortunately, the above bumper sticker does nothing glorify the love of Christ. All it does is pander to those who need to be affirmed.

Truth is lost in ambiguity; the reader learns nothing.

What a doctrinally worthless bumper sticker!

I did say I was tired, didn’t I?

And just for fun… watch Allie Beth Stuckey as a feminist (thank the Lord she’s only acting!).