Author Archives: rmfonc

A Transformed Marriage

The Truth Hurts

I’ll never forget what happened in the winter of 2014. Christmas was only two weeks away, and I had been working hard getting ready for our church play. My husband had just lost his job, and we both were stressed to the max. We got in an argument over something simple, but it was enough to bring the truth out of his mouth. He said, “I want a separation! We don’t make each other happy anymore, and I just want to be happy.”

I was shocked. I knew our marriage had been on a roller coaster for years, but after attending a marriage conference a few months prior, I was taking baby steps to becoming a better wife. I agreed to the separation, and within a couple of weeks, I had an apartment picked out.

The Transformation

On December 29, 2014, I got a phone call from a lady inviting me to come sign the lease to my new apartment. At first I was excited, but then I began to cry. As I sit in my car at work, I began praying to God. I said, “Lord, I know divorce cannot be your plan for my life. I only want to do your will. Please show me what to do.”

Immediately, God put it in my spirit to ask my husband one last time if he really wanted me to leave. He said no, and then admitted to having an affair with a woman he met online. I knew that if I wanted to save my marriage, I had to allow God to transform me into the wife He called me to be, according to His word. So I begged God to forgive me for all my failures as a wife, and to show me a better way.

Although my husband was clearly living in sin, I was more worried about the changes I needed to make. I committed that day to doing whatever it would take for restoration. My husband ended his affair, and we starting forming new, healthy habits. We stayed up late most evenings spending quality time together, we planned weekly date nights, we wrote each other love letters and sweet text messages, begin praying together, and sleeping in the same bad every night. At first it was awkward, but then it just became the normal. Our marriage was not only restored, but it’s better now than it ever was before.

From Pain to Purpose

imageMy husband and I both have endured a lot of pain in the eight and half years we’ve been married. We’ve faced trials and overcome obstacles we never thought we would. But now we’re beginning to see the big picture. God allowed us to go through some things, so that He could use us to help others.

Now we are very passionate about teaching others God’s design for marriage. We teach a marriage class weekly at our church, I have a personal blog, and we just hosted our first marriage conference.

If you would like more information about our ministry, please check out my website You can also follow me at




Leave a comment

Filed under Marriage