I know, everyone hates them, even those of us who write them.
But you know that if your readers are actually going to take the time to read through an entire 1500-word masterpiece, it had better be interlaced with plenty of eye-grabbing pictures, recessed quotes, and more headers than an Irish bar at lunchtime. . . or a gathering of hot-rodders, whichever analogy you prefer.
Since I’ve been guilty of writing blog posts with word counts in excess of 1,500 words, I thought it might be a good idea to offer some tips on how to get through such large, monumental, and brilliant works of literary genius.
- Skim it. That’s right, don’t try to read every little word, just skim through the post… then leave a comment.
- Only read the points that interest you. Yes sometimes you can just skim through a post and look for the headers that are most interesting. Just read what comes under those and forget about the rest.
Then, of course, leave a comment. - Pictures and quotes. If reading an entire post is too taxing for your brain, then just look at the pictures and read a quote or two.
After that, leave a colorful comment. - Re-read the title of the post and make up your own idea for what the post is about. Could it get any more simple?
Once you’ve imagined your own content, leave a comment.
So, there you have it! Four easy tips on how to get through those long, tedious, over-the-top, brilliant, etc. etc. etc., glorious post that are longer than 500 words.
And here’s a gratuitous picture of my 1lb, 11oz-dog, George.
Note: If you don’t understand that this post is meant to be humorous, comment begging, and self-deprecating, just go back and look at the picture of my puppy. You need to smile.
The Recovering Legalist 
Here is 4 tips to writing a Op.
1) don’t have contempt for your readers.
2) post something meaningful, that includes scripture and will bring people closer to Christ.
3)Post scriptures in context and on topic not cut out of context, and only teach on the subject the author is trying to teach about.
4) Keep it interesting with a story and why its applicable to your readers in every day life.
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Back at you! *and separate your text/paragraphs so a larger amount can be read easier.
Dear friend, just to ease the tension in the room, I originally wrote this piece over a year ago. It was meant to be light-hearted and funny, not to be a jab. I wrote it originally after publishing a piece that was nearly 2,000 words. So, there.
As to writing things that are meaningful, the Holy Spirit can use anything I write, don’t you think? Especially if it’s not some vulgar trash, or something. A light-hearted post can be used to brighten a person’s day (“Lift up the hands that hang down” Heb. 12:12).
As to posting Scripture, my blog is meant to be more than a simple expository commentary; it’s a place to post my thoughts, the thoughts of a person being transparent about his walk with Christ.
As for keeping it interesting, most people love pictures of puppies. “Most,” I said. You can’t please everybody all the time.
Aside from that, I try my best to space things, but even though I tried to space out the paragraphs in the numbered section of this post, the format kept auto-correcting back to the default. I tried.
Oh, and I try best to spell correctly and use proper grammar.
I just stopped to get my trailer and get a saw, but checked the email.
I just posted it, because what I said was correct.
Alrighty then 🙂 Be careful with that saw.
So now I am back from work. My Son is a Licensed Electrician and one of his side jobs was to wire a house and do a bit in the separate Garage.
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One day the customer went into their 2 car garage to find the ceiling rafters broken and all the stuff they had in the attic space half way to the floor. The upsairs was half way into the down stairs.
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Another contractor wouldn’t touch it. It looked like it was pushing the front beam above the door and the back wall out and it was ready to come crashing down.
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I went in and use ratchet straps for a tractor trailer to connect the broken 2x10s and hold them together while I jacked each one up bit by bit and over the course of the day we got the whole thing back up and then started doubling up the broken ceiling joists with another 2×10.
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Then because they where 36″ apart I put an LVL laminate beam 9.5×2″ x 22ft long between each ceiling joist so now there is one about every 16 inches. and then I used 2×10 to do solid bridging front and back.
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But It changed their lives. And I have been witnessing to them. They think I am a miracle worker. And they see the compassion I have for the homeless and they know how nice my son is. They have already given me two gifts and I haven’t even given them a bill yet.
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I likely will do over 50 K next year for them in fences and landscaping and re-doing the garage etc. But the biggest gain will be for them to become born again people.
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So that was my day, and I couldn’t put it in a shorter post.
I wouldn’t have wanted you to 🙂 God bless you for the work you do! Many of us wish we just had the skills to do such things. But you have the skill and you’re giving it to God. That’s awesome.
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From my perspective, you made some valid points even if was done in humor. One of my readers doesn’t read long posts due to a medical condition that makes reading a long post difficult for her. I try to include shorter posts as well. I hadn’t thought about it until reading your post, but I will sometimes do 1) or 2). Sometimes skimming gets me interested in reading the rest of the post.
One blogger I follow seems to think that really long posts are the only way to go. It doesn’t help that this blogger also doesn’t truncate posts and doesn’t add page breaks so finding her posts is easier when I look up her blog on the WordPress Reader.
I follow the first 4 instructions as I have an eye problem. (Old eyes). I love to read all my bloggers I entertain.:)
Love George! And the post is great, too! 😉 Good tips for College students here as well…what works for long blog posts works for overwhelming class reading lists. 😀 Always words of wisdom from you Anthony! Thank you.
Hahahaha…. I feel so much better now with my short-er posts. Last year I seemed to have several posts that were 1500-2000 words. Now I’m averaging 700-800. I’ve been feeling “off” a bit because they seemed to short. Alas! I shall take your advice and have mercy upon my readers. Who am I to force them to “skim” my posts? And I must add cute puppy pics! I wonder if the hubby would mind us getting a cute fur-baby. Hmmm….
If for no other reason than gratuitous pics of puppy cuteness. Name him Clickbait.
Lol! I could call him C.B. and no one would be the wiser. Yes!!!!
I didn’t know there were dogs that small. (You said to leave a comment). 😀
LOL
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